Page 66 of Perfect Playbook

“He was from Starlight Canyon?” Logan sounds surprised.

“No, if he was, you’d already know the story, right?”

“Probably.”

“He was from California. I visited my brothers a lot when they moved. Once I stayed with them for a three-week vacation and had a thing. Nino’s dad was a bad guy, who I knew was a bad guy, because he told me he’d been tojail before. So trust me when I say I wasn’t surprised he skipped out on me, on us. Nino’s never met him.”

As soon as I say it, I brace for the judgment. It’s borderline flattering that some people think I’m too good a girl to make a mistake with a bad boy. But I was chasing Logan’s replacement so hard in my twenties, I made some overly optimistic choices. Well, to be fair to me, some of them were good boys in the beginning. But it seems I attract cheaters.

But Nino’s father was a bad boy right from the start. By that point, I was nearly thirty and I wasn’t chasing love anymore. By then, I’d already decided there were no good ones left. So why not a summer fling with someone I knew I’d never love? Someone a little wild and wrong from the very start. It was the last youthful, stupid thing I ever did.

I managed to keep Nino’s dad a secret from everyone but my family who, in light of my pregnancy, were on a need-to-know basis. The news spread all the way to Oaxaca, and every single one of my relatives asked:

Shay, how could you have been senseless enough to get with a criminal?

But Logan doesn’t ask that.

Instead, he asks, “Are you two safe?”

His concern shocks me; every inch of my skin is still. Nobody has ever asked me that. They always want to know how I could be so dumb. Hell, sometimes I still ask myself that question, but then it doesn’t take me long to stop asking. All I need is one look at Antonio with his eyes closed, sleeping like an angel, to know it was a detour to where I belong.

Logan seems all of a sudden two sizes bigger, hackles up, fire in his eyes, as if he doesn’t get the answer he needs about Nino’s dad, he’s ready to rage.

I’ve never seen him like this before. It’s both terrifying and sexy at the same time.

“Last thing I heard, Antonio’s father is in prison, so I’m pretty sure we’re fine. And anyway, my brothers will likely kill him before you do if that’s what you’re thinking. Calm down.” I bump into his arm. “You’re so transparent.”

I mimic his words from the hall at the arena, hoping to lighten the moment, but it comes off as teasing flirtation, and with his skin so close to mine, it might not have been a good idea.

Logan’s jaw tics. The venom is still in his eyes, his gaze still full of protection. “I promise you Shay, you can’t see the half of what I’d do if that man ever came around.”

I offer a grateful smile.

He contemplates me and my confession. “You might think I changed, but you haven’t.”

“Yeah? What does that mean? I still don’t have my shit together?” I say it like a throwaway joke, but humor always borrows from truth. I don’t have my shit together. Look at me now.

Logan doesn’t correct me and tell me I’m doing great. I respect his answer more than vapid reassurance.

“Success is a very personal concept and can’t be measured by anyone else. People can tell you you’re doing great and you still know you haven’t reached your potential. It seems to me you’re not satisfied yet.”

His aim hits the bullseye in my heart.

He tilts his head. “What I’m referring to is that you’re still bold as fuck.”

It’s a compliment that sizzles through my veins, the kind I would pay for. But also one that’s not true. Because if I was bold, I would lean over and let my hand trace that goddamn bulge between his thighs.

Instead, I’m relieved he’ll be gone.

Chapter Twenty-Two

SIXTEEN YEARS AGO

I siton the bed in my dorm room, tapping my foot. We likely only have a few more weeks together, less if I include the time he’s away for games in between, so my patience is thin. Five minutes less with Logan is like losing an eternity.

Logan is now a free agent, and negotiations for what NHL team will sign him are all underway. He’s told me one of the teams is the Scorpions. I don’t pray for anything else anymore but for him to sign in-state. I can’t think of anything else, and every moment without him feels like a waste of my timenow.

The red numbers on my alarm clock read two-thirty. Why is my boyfriend always late? The women’s march sets off at three, and the start line is at least twenty minutes away.

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