Page 125 of An Unexpected Love

She twisted her head away from him, still refusing to answer.

“I love you, Charlotte. I realized when we first started seeing each other that you’d been badly hurt by your ex-husband. I didn’t understand the extent of it until now, but in some ways I think not knowing was for the best. It would have intimidated me in the beginning.”

A sob tore through her throat.

“The first time we kissed… I wish I knew how to explain it, but I knew you were different. That moment was different than any I’d ever known before. Kissing you was so good.”

Charlotte didn’t respond, but she knew he was right. Their kisseshadbeen good. Very good.

“It got even better, didn’t it?”

She nodded, although only slightly.

“You’re not frigid, or whatever term the psychologists prefer now. Not even close. What you are, my love, is afraid, and for a very legitimate reason. You’ve been sexually abused.”

“I’m sexually…damaged. Forever.”

“No, not forever. In time you’ll heal. We’ll heal together.” He said it with such conviction, as though they faced only a small problem, when to her it was bigger than both of them. Bigger than even their love.

“But it isn’tyouwho…can’t make love,” she sobbed. “It’s me. You’re not the one who has to heal…and I don’t know if I can.”

“We’re in this together, Charlotte. Whatever it takes.”

“There isn’t any reason you should—”

“We can’t heal,” he interrupted, “unless we try. We can’t sweep this under the carpet and ignore it. I’m not so stupid as to believe that all the pain and all the memories will go away simply because we make love and it’s as good as our kisses have been.”

“I…don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forget.”

Jason rolled away from her, freeing her arms and legs. He stood and raked his hand through his hair. “The decision is yours, and I’ll abide by whatever you want. I’m not going to force you to be my wife. I’ve made some mistakes in this relationship and just now was one of them. I’m sure I’ll make more. You should know that.”

“I don’t understand what you’re saying.” She sat up and wiped the tears from her burning cheeks, her hands trembling. Jason had moved away from her and was staring out the window.

“Like I said, the decision is yours. If you want me tofile for an annulment, then I will. I’ll make the arrangements to get us off this island as quickly as possible. As soon as I can, I’ll take care of all the legalities. In a few days there won’t be anything to bind us together—if that’s what you want.”

“I see.” Her heart filled with mourning.

“But there’s something you should understand, Charlotte. If you decide you want to give this marriage a try, there’ll be no turning back.”

She did understand, and the thought filled her with panic.

“I’m willing to devote myself to you and the marriage, but I’ll need the same kind of commitment from you. In other words, you’re going to have towantto heal. It may mean counseling for you, for us both. We both have to be willing to do whatever it takes.”

“I don’t know if I could…ever tell anyone else about my marriage to Tom.”

“That’s your decision, too. If you want to stay my wife, you have to realize that the time will come when wewillmake love—but only when you’re ready. And when we do, it’ll be good, Charlotte… I promise you that.”

“How often?” It was probably a stupid question, but one she needed to know. She might be able to bear it if Jason wanted to make love occasionally. She might be able to overcome the terror if he wasn’t too demanding.

“I can’t answer that because I don’t know.”

“More than once a month?”

He turned away from her, but not before she saw his smile. “Yes, Charlotte, more than once a month.”

“I see.”

“It seems to me that you have some serious thinkingto do. Perhaps it would be best if I left for a while. When I come back, you can tell me your thoughts. Does that sound fair?”

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