Page 31 of Taming Bull

“That’s good. If those statistics of yours are right, sounds like a club of overprotective veteran biker guardians is what every girl needs.”

I chuckled. “Yeah. She’s been through a lot. Nobody wants to see her get hurt.”

“And you think you’ll hurt her?” Tavonte asked.

“Not intentionally, no. But there’s a lot of shit I can’t give her. Shit she needs.” I pulled out my wallet and flipped it open to Amber’s senior picture. God, she was gorgeous, and if I didn’t know better, I’d swear I was looking at a picture of Lily. Holding open my wallet, I showed the portrait to Tavonte.

“Lily?” he asked. His gaze immediately sought her out across the room.

“No. That’s Amber.”

His eyebrows jumped up his forehead. “Your… ex?”

“Yep.”

“What the fuck?”

“Exactly. If Lily and I get together, it’ll be the real deal. It’ll be forever. She needs a family. She deserves to marry someone who can give her one. I can’t. My parents are best friends with Amber’s, and if I bring home Amber’s doppelganger… how fucked up would that be?”

“Shit, man.” Tavonte scratched at the stubble on his jaw. “I hear ya, loud and clear.”

Feeling vindicated for the way I’d pushed Lily away, I straightened. “Thank you. Now you see why I gotta be an asshole. She wants more than friendship, and this thing between us… it’ll never work.”

He met my gaze. “You know about my dad… about how he died in the service. What you don’t know is that my stepdad did, too. Mack was a Seal. And coincidentally, a biker. He was a good guy, and the best damn stand-in dad I could have asked for. Then one day, he went out to shoot hoops with a buddy. He got winded and said he needed a minute. He sat down, and he never got back up. Died right there on the court. Turned out he had a heart defect no examination had found. His death about destroyed my mom. My sister was just a baby, and if Mom didn’t have us to take care of, I think she would have given up.”

Wondering what his story had to do with my situation, I frowned. “I’m sorry, brother.”

He shrugged. “It’s crazy, you know. Years later, right before I went into the service, I asked mom about her husbands. I wanted to know if it was worth it.”

“Worth what?” I asked.

“She was married to each of them for such a short time, I wondered if the love they shared—the good times—if it was worth all the pain.”

“What’d she say?” I asked, suddenly needing to know.

“She looked me in the eye and said, ‘Yes. There’s nuthin’ in the world like knowin’ you’re loved. If I had to do it all again, I would. But I sure as hell wouldn’t have made Mack wait so long. I would have married that man the first time he asked, and to hell with anyone’s opinion about how long a widow should wait.’”

I stared at him, wondering what to say.

“So, no. I don’t see why you and Lily shouldn’t be together. I see a good man who’s making a misguided decision for a woman who has her own mind and should be able to make her own damn decision. You wanna know what Lily really deserves? She deserves a choice. It’s kinda ironic how pissed you are at Amber for not coming to you with her life changing, devastating news, when you’re doing the same thing to Lily.”

He was right.

I felt the truth of his words, and they knocked the goddamn wind out of me.

“Don’t make the same mistake Amber made,” Tavonte said, standing. “Tell her. As my mom would advise you, tell her now. Your ass isn’t promised tomorrow.”

9

Lily

IHAVE A dog. I’m surrounded by babies and friends. I’m beginning an awesome apprenticeship soon. My life is amazing. And full. Hell, it’s so complete it’s practically a new game of Jenga. All my pieces are together, and nothing’s in danger of going sideways. I have everything I need.

A man?I scoffed at the idea.

I don’t need a man. I’ve got this. I’m a fuckin’ boss.

You know what? I’ll be my own man.

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