Page 56 of Come Back to Me

“How are you feeling this morning?” she asks gently.

“I’m okay, a bit of a headache… Thanks for the water and the pain relievers,” I say, trying to give her a slight smile so she’ll hopefully look a little less worried.

“Do you want to talk about it? It’s not like you to drink like that.” she says, her voice kind and quiet.

There’s compassion in her voice and it makes me feel more ashamed of myself for shutting her out.

I sit quietly for several long minutes, trying to force my words out, but I just can’t. They won’t come.

She tries again, “Jack, you’re worrying me. I know it’s only been a week, but you’re not being yourself.”

“Has your best friend ever died? Do you think I should be all fucking sunshine and rainbows?” I snap.

She looks like I slapped her. Fuck, I don’t even know where that came from.

God, I’m a dick.

She’s looking straight ahead again, not even able to look at me.

I’m such a jerk.

She doesn’t deserve this. It’s not her fault and I’ve never talked to her like this before.

Is this the kind of man I am?

Neither of us say anything for a solid five minutes and I can’t take sitting here knowing I’ve hurt her to the point she’s afraid to say anything to me.

I stand up, feeling like I need to get out of here before I do anything else to disappoint her or myself.

She turns her gaze on me, a questioning look in her eyes.

“I need to go pick up Gracie at my parents. I appreciate you getting me last night. I think… I think I just need to be alone today so I’m gonna head out.” I say, not able to meet her eyes with mine.

I quickly turn and walk back into the house, grab my keys, then head down the steps before she can stop me, or I change my mind and stay.

ANNIE

Sitting in my office at work, I can’t seem to make my brain focus on anything but Jack.

I stare at my computer screen, reading the words on the policy I need to update but unable to process them. I’ve tried to re-read them three times now but am still struggling.

If I thought the first week after Teddy’s death was bad, it’s like the second week said, “hold my beer,” and decided to show me it could be worse.

Jack stopped staying over at my house a week ago and hasn’t invited me to his. He hasn’t been back in the ER on a medical call since Teddy died, and he’s stopped sending me text messages with excuses for why he won’t be in the ambulance on days he’s working.

In my desperation, I showed up at his house yesterday, unannounced. I can’t get the interaction out of my head.

After knocking on Jack’s front door, I stand waiting for severalminutes before he answers. He looks disheveled… his hair is a mess, coffee stains cover the front of his T-shirt, and he has dark circles under his eyes.

“Annie, w-what are you doing here?” Jack clutches a handful of his hair in his fist, and I worry because it’s his tell when he’s nervous or upset.

“I just wanted to see you. Thought maybe we could go on a walk or have some coffee together.” I force a smile, hoping to put him at ease.

“Oh… um.” Still standing in the doorway, he looks over his shoulder back into the house. “How about you meet me out back on the patio? I’ll bring some coffee out.”

“Jack, I can come in and help so you don’t have to manage two cups of coffee and the door.” I move toward him, but his words stop me.

“No, my house is a mess. I don’t want you to see it like this. I’ll see you out back in a minute.” With that, he retreats into the house and shuts the door.

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