Page 178 of Steps

He pulls me into his arms and hugs me securely.“Anyway, I showed you the letter because I don’t want to keep anything fromyou.”

I look at my backpack again in the corner on thefloor. The acceptance letter is still hiding inside. I feel guilty for keepingit from Varen. But hearing him say he’d push me to leave if he knew I wasaccepted, makes me want to continue hiding it to hold on to our relationship.

45

“Are you sure about this, girl?” Kenya asks forthe hundredth time. “It’s permanent.”

She’s standing at my side while my body is at anangle in the tattoo parlor chair. My sweater’s down a bit to expose my chest.

“Yes,” I tell her again, excited. I’ve decided toget the raven tattoo today for Varen’s birthday. He doesn’t know I’m here, soit’ll be a sweet surprise.

“Ready?” Carmen, the tattoo artist, asks me. She’sthe one who designed Varen’s trail of birds.

I swallow hard and nod. “Yes. Go ahead please.”

She positions the needle over my skin. The buzzingheightens my nerves. I take a deep breath and remain steady as she begins.

“Shit,” I sputter through clenched teeth andtighten my grip on Kenya’s hand as the needle touches my skin. “It freakingstings.”

“Don’t move,” Carmen reminds, making the design onmy chest. She’s so focused, unmoved.

I watch Kenya’s facial expressions to know howit’s going since I can’t see it yet. Every few seconds, she smiles and bobs asif impressed with Carmen’s work.

She gives me a thumbs up when it’s close tofinishing. “You’re going to love it, Toya.”

“Yeah?” I smile tightly through the pain.

“It’s dope.”

Carmen keeps a straight face, fixed only on herwork. When she finishes, she turns off the needle and hands me a mirror.

A satisfied grin stretches my lips as I stare atthe small black bird on my chest. “Oh my gosh, it’s beautiful. Thank you.” Theskin is a bit red and achy, but it’ll look even better once it’s healed.

“No problem.” Carmen chuckles. “If you ever wantto add more, come right back.”

I shake my head. “This is perfect. I hope he likesit.”

“He better,” Kenya pipes in, pursing her lips.

Carmen applies medicated ointment and clear tapeover the tattoo. “This will keep it from becoming infected. Leave it coveredfor a few hours, then wash with warm water. Should heal after a week or two,since it’s small.”

“Thank you,” I say again, and take cash from myclutch to pay her.

Kenya and I head out soon after.

“So what else you have planned for your man’sbirthday?” she asks when we get into her car.

She pulls onto the street. “I invited his dad andAlison out to dinner at that popular restaurant by the harbor.” I look at herand wink as I add, “He’ll get his dessert later tonight.”

“Ugh. Nasty.” She scoffs.

I giggle and bite my lip. “Varen’s not intobirthday parties. Figured he’d want to at least celebrate with his familythough.”

Silence settles in the car a moment. “Um, your momisn’t joining you at the restaurant?”

I release a long sigh. “She says maybe.”

Kenya reaches over and pats my arm. “Hope shecomes around soon.”

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