Page 84 of Bitter Beats

I frown as beads of hurt form in the pit of my stomach. As each thought and every doubt flickers through my mind, more beads accumulate. They layer on top of each other, higher and higher, filling me from the inside out. My throat tightens as disappointment claws at me.

Was that staged? Did Maverick even want to kiss me? Is anything between us real, or am I reading into it? Making this more than what it is? Am I that desperate for a connection? For love…

“Mckenna?” Mav asks, looking at me strangely.

I shake my head and back away from the front door. I grab my cell phone and slip it into my pocket. Then, I pick up my coffee mug, gripping it tightly. Even though the coffee is cold, I force myself to take a sip. The familiarity of it comforts me. The normalcy of drinking coffee centers me, and I tip my head toward the stairs.

“I’m freezing. I’m gonna take a shower.”

“What about breakfast?” Mav asks.

“I’m not hungry. You eat. I’ll be down in a bit.” My voice is monotone. I scurry up the stairs.

I need to put distance between Mav and me so I canthink. It’s too easy to revel in a moment with him. It feels natural to consider a future when he’s at my side, piling compliments onmy head and being so damn present. He’s too skilled at reeling me in, even though I don’t want to be caught.Can’tbe caught. Not fully. Because if Maverick scoops me up, I’ll never survive the heartache he’ll deliver.

Maverick Tate is a serial flirt and a genuine charmer. He’s wildly dangerous to a searching, seeking heart like mine.

TWENTY-EIGHT

MAV

Something is off.It’s big. And I hate it.

Since our Snow Day, Mckenna has kept her distance. She’s thrown herself into preparing for next semester, for her clinic, which makes zero sense since most of her classmates are home, enjoying the holiday break with their families.

Three nights ago, she spent the evening studying in the library. Two nights ago, she grabbed dinner with Lia, of all people. Last night, she was passed out when I got home from hanging with Flip.

I didn’t want to pass by his pre-NYE gathering, but with Mckenna giving me the cold shoulder, anything was better than sitting in the house, alone, wondering what the fuck shifted between us. And how the hell I missed it.

Sighing, I push Mckenna from my mind. We landed in Vegas over an hour ago. Jameson and Amelia flew out with us, which served as a buffer between Mckenna’s and my awkwardness.

Can you believe that?

Jameson and Amelia’s tumultuous relationship seemed more legit today than my fake-turned-confusing connection with Mckenna.Thatbothered me on a whole new level.

“You good?” Jameson asks as I flop down on the couch in his suite.

“Fine,” I reply.

He snorts. “Stop bullshitting me, man.”

I shake my head.

“You know, you guys seem really intense for a fake relationship. I thought you made up from the label’s Christmas party mess? You were gonna woo her,” he reminds me.

“I did,” I admit. “Things were great. I mean, we had a really nice Christmas, and then… I don’t know. It feels like she’s just lost in her own head. Physically, she shows up for everything, goes through the motions, but she isn’t really connected.” I tap the side of my head.

Levi snorts as he enters the suite. “Kenny should’ve ghosted you weeks ago.”

I flip him the middle finger.

“Where’s Reign?” Jameson asks.

“Greeting the girls with A. He’ll be up in ten.” Levi collapses next to me. “Can you believe we’re fucking playing Vegas for New Year’s Eve?”

“Ivy and Nova?” I guess.

“It’s gonna be sick,” Jameson agrees.