Page 41 of Secret Hudson

I shake my head. “What’s that, like conversion therapy? Trying to convince you that you’re actually straight?”

“Yep. I went twice a week for six months before my mother found out I wasn’t going to meet with my math tutor on Tuesdays and Thursdays like my father had told her. They fought. Huge blow out. My mother called him every name under the sun while my father simply declared that he would not under any circumstances have a faggot for a son. So, my mother told him he had nothing to worry about. She could fix that. Said while she was it, she’d also take care of that business regarding him having a wife. And that was the end of that. She threw a bunch of stuff into the back of her station wagon and we left that night. Never saw him again.”

“Wow.” Apparently being completely ignored isn’t the worst thing a parent can do to you.

“Yeah. After that, my mother went out of her way to create an environment where I’d never feel rejected ever again. To say I was sheltered would definitely be an understatement, but I’m grateful because those years she homeschooled me and kept me away from people who shared my father’s twisted beliefs made me stronger. By the time I stepped out into the world as an adult, I never second guessed myself. I was okay enough with myself to make up for anyone I might come across who wasn’t. My mother did that for me.” He gets quiet. “But it cost her. Regardless of how many times she’s called him an asshole, my mother loved that man. Whatever differences kept them apart, there were more ties between them that had linked them together. I don’t doubt for one second they’d still be married if things had been different. If I had been different. But I wasn’t.”

It’s my turn to stroke his cheeks and dry the tears his father caused way before I ever even met him. “Well, for very selfish reasons, I’m really glad you’re not different.” I bend down, my lips pressing against his.

“You mean because it would make moments like these particularly awkward?”

I grin, running my left hand along his chest, over his waist and under the covers he has draped over his hips. “For example.”

Mostly I just can’t imagine a world in which I wouldn’t be able to love him the way that I love him. Although, even as I think it, I realize that’s precisely the type of world I created for myself. Or, at least, I believed that I had.

HUDSON

Things have shifted between us. And while I know that our reality hasn’t changed much, our relationship has. All levels of lies and dishonesty have been eliminated. Maybe there are things we still can’t agree on. Compromises we still need to determine. But we have honesty. Real, raw and ugly honesty. And that, is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever shared with anyone.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

ROYCE

Australia has officially become the happy ever after part of this whole tour. It doesn’t hurt that it marks the end of our world travels for a while, nor do I resent the fact that after our second and final show here, we’re left with an entire week of vacation in one of the most amazing places on earth.

Being as Ava always plans tours this way and that she considers this last stretch of the trip to be family time, we don’t have a whole lot of freedom on how we want to spend it. Thankfully, Ava would have made a damn fine travel agent because everything we do is like something straight out of a vacation magazine.

Sunday is spent taking a day trip out to tour the local wine country. While we all stick to grape juice to support Blaise, the scenery and atmosphere is more than enough to give you a nice content buzz all day long.

Monday, we venture out for a private tour of the Sidney Taronga Zoo, mostly because Ava read that they let you cuddle their koalas and apparently that’s some sort of childhood dream of hers.

“You’re not going to try and smuggle that thing out of here, are you?”

She casually drapes the long flowy sleeves of her dress over the baby koala she’s cradling. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Avalon!”

She makes a face and hisses, “Fine. Jackass. But I’ll have you know, Hudson was in on this. He’s busy distracting the tour guide as we speak.”

He later denies said accusations. Well, until I’m already dozing off. Then he confesses the whole thing thinking I’m already asleep.

Tuesday, Ava gets us up extra early to board a boat. It’s so damn early I don’t know what the fuck is going on or what we’re doing, so when the humpback whale surfaces three feet away from where I’m leaning over the railing trying not to puke up the three cups of coffee I chugged in hopes of waking up, I about piss my fucking pants.

“What did you think we were going to do on a whale watching cruise?” Hudson muses.

“You’re not supposed to do that,” I grumble.

“Do what?”

“Laugh at me.”

He flashes me that sexy smirk. “So, laugh with me.” And I do. Just like that.

Wednesday, we find ourselves back on a boat and this time I’m careful to pay better attention. Of course, even if I didn’t, I’d figure out something is up when they start handing out the oxygen tanks. We spend the entire day snorkeling and diving around the Great Barrier Reef and it’s fucking phenomenal.

By Thursday I’m ready for a day on land and so, after much arguing and implementing my fine-tuned persuasion skills, Avalets Hudson and I opt out of the shark diving outing. That shit is more Blaise and Angel’s speed anyway.

Then, on Friday we take off for New Zealand where Ava has a special surprise planned for Derek. A total Lord of the Rings fanatic, he about loses it when we show up at Middle Earth for a Hobbit Tour. To be fair, it’s pretty fucking cool even for those of us who only watched the movies, and then only the ones with Orlando Bloom and Viggo Mortensen in them, which is to say Hudson, Ava and I have a blast as well.

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