Page 144 of Sincerely, Your Enemy

“That’s why you’ve been helping me out financially.” Lacey connects the dots. “Because you still blame yourself for leaving them.”

“Because I realized it doesn’t matter if you’re biologically mine. The two of you might not be my flesh and blood… but you’re my heart.”

My throat aches so much it’s impossible to swallow.

This isn’t happening. It can’t be.

Daniel turns to me. “I’m so sorry I didn’t realize that sooner. And I know you have no reason to believe me, but there’s nothing I want more than to be a part of your life again. I never stopped caring about you and Kelsea. Never stopped checking in on you, even from a distance. I just… If you’re open to it, I’d love to make things right.”

His apology is my breaking point. I know I’m seconds away from losing it, and I won’t be able to keep it together unless I get out of here. Now.

Everything I thought I knew was wrong.

All this energy I’ve wasted being angry at my father for leaving… I’ve driven myself mad for years, wondering why Kelsea and I weren’t enough.

I push to my feet so fast it startles them both. “I’m sorry, I have to go.”

I want to scream, break shit, cry until my voice gives out, but I need to be alone to do it. I need to be somewhere she won’t see me.

Where no one can see me.

“TJ!” Lacey calls behind me, but I’m already booking it to the front door.

I can’t bring myself to turn around, swinging the door open and rushing out of the house. I can hear Lacey’s footsteps thundering in the distance, but I don’t stop.

I’m halfway to my car when she catches up to me, her hand wrapping around my bicep.

“TJ, wait!”

She spins me around, forcing me to look at her. My eyes hurt from holding back the tears, and she must see it because her emotionless façade immediately crumbles.

“I’m so sorry you had to find out this way,” she says.

I can’t maintain the eye contact, staring blankly ahead of me.

“Are you going to be okay?” she croaks, her voice thick with worry.

Not so long ago, I would’ve jumped in front of a moving train if it meant knowing that she still cared about me, but my head is too messed up for me to be happy about her chasing after me right now.

“No,” I admit.

It’s as though the barrier between us just collapsed and hit the ground. She doesn’t hesitate, throwing her arms around me for a hug. I want to hug her back. But I also don’t want to hold her, knowing it might be the last time.

It’s a miracle I manage not to break down when she squeezes me tighter.

“It’s going to be okay,” she whispers.

“No, it’s not.” I separate from her, backing away. “You don’t get it. I’ve spent my whole life hating him. Hatingyou. You and your mom. I convinced myself he was a monster, but it turns out… the monster is my mom.”

“Don’t say that. She’s not a monster,” she says to make me feel better when, in fact, she has no idea.

I thought I knew my mom better than anyone. Now, I’m not so sure.

I shove a frantic hand through my hair. “Fuck, I ruined everything. I destroyed the only good thing in my life to avenge a woman who couldn’t even be bothered to tell us the fucking truth.”

I only realize I’ve said too much when Lacey’s face twists with shock. “What do you meanavengeher?”

Why did I say that? Fuck, I should’ve kept my mouth shut.