Page 19 of The Scattered Bones

“I see.” He turned away from me. “Then I must go, because I can’t watch this. I won’t survive losing you. As it is, I already feel as if a dull and rusted knife has pierced my heart, the pieces jagged and oozing.” Sorrow wove through his voice. “I love you, but I won’t come back. If I do, it’ll destroy me. I don’t want to live in a world without you, but I have to. I might as well get used to it.”

Kaid dropped gracefully off the ledge, and panic washed over me. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t hear. My heart was breaking, my soul was dying, and it was as if some deep part of my spirit took control of my body. I was no longer commanded by my limbs. My desperation ruled me, and I was across the roof before I registered my movements. Kaid fell to a decorative balcony below, and I vaulted down after him. He’d trained me well. I was strong. I was fast. I was feral.

He heard my feet land behind him, but he didn’t turn. He didn’t acknowledge my alarmed chase, and he gripped the opposite wall to climb out. One swift movement and he would be gone. He would no longer exist within the temple. He would belong to Szent, and if I allowed that to happen, his presence would never again grace mine. I couldn’t describe the sheer terror in my gut. All I knew was I couldn’t let him leave, so I ran.

I ran with loud steps and louder breaths, and as he gripped the ledge, I threw myself at him. My fingers captured his hand, my fist closing around him, and the world ceased to exist. The moon disappeared. The stars vanished. Szent fell away, and the wind stilled. There was nothing. There was no one. All that remained was the warmth of his skin against mine, the roughness of his palms scraping against my fingertips, his pulse jerking through the pressure point at his wrist.

I’d touched him. I had touched Kaid, and it was beautiful. The moment was sacred, destined to stay with me until death claimed me. My hand clutched him tighter as tears blurred my vision, but I didn’t let go. I couldn’t form words, so my hands spoke for me. They told him everything in that touch. One deliberate touch, and I’d chosen. He was what I wanted to pledge my life to. I was trapped in this temple, my future not my own, but my love was mine to give, and I offered it to him. I gave it to him with all of my heart.

My thief stared at our joined hands, and the pain on his face wasn’t what I expected. It was excruciating, as if my touch was acid burning his flesh. Tears ran down his cheeks, smearing the ash, and then he pulled his hand free and climbed over the wall. He vanished into the night like a shadow, leaving me alone in my grief. At least I’d experienced his touch before he ripped my heart from my chest.

* * *

I left my window unlocked,but he didn’t come. I waited for three weeks, but he never returned. Kaid was gone, and he took my will to live with him. At the dawn of the fourth week, I resolved to close off my heart. I was a shell, my soul with the thief who stole it. It was for the best. I was already empty for Hreinasta to invade.

* * *

The overwhelming senseof being watched washed over me, and I jerked awake. Sleep had eluded me for days, but my body had finally succumbed to exhaustion. I’d been oblivious to the world, sensing nothing until his eyes found me in the darkness. I’d memorized the way his gaze trailed over me like a touch. I knew his scent. I recognized his presence. He had burrowed so deep within me that even the sound of his breathing had been ingrained in my memory, and I twisted on the mattress to stare at the sofa beneath the window.His sofa.

“Hi.” He smiled hesitantly, his expression asking for forgiveness.

“Hi.” I offered it wholeheartedly.

“Fifty cycles ago, a thief stole jewels from Varas’ temple and sold them to a warlord. The thief was punished for the crime against his house, but the jewels were never recovered since no one could infiltrate the warlord’s camps.” Kaid looked at me with hope in his eyes. “Until now.”

“You?” Pride swelled in my chest.

“I recovered every last one.” He extended his fist. “I asked Varas if I might keep this, and he gave it to me with his full blessing.” Kaid’s hand unfurled, and the smallest jewel I’d ever seen sat on his palm. It was a vibrant emerald, flawless and sparkling despite its size. “I stole this for you.” His voice was nervous, as if he was offering me his beating heart and not a gem.

I climbed off the bed and stared at his apology before plucking it from his palm. My fingers grazed his skin as I accepted it, and his chest rose with an unsteady breath.

“It’s beautiful. Thank you.” I gazed at him, tears blurring my vision. He’d come back to me. He knew the future we would face, and he had returned.

“Do you want to hear how I did it?” He leaned forward in anticipation, his question not really about telling me a story. It was a plea to stay. To return to the friends we were.

I didn’t answer him as I walked to the sofa. I hovered before him, and then my gaze drifted to the space beside him. He shifted sideways, understanding my silent request, and I sat on the vacated cushion. The sofa was small, but a fraction of air separated us. We weren’t touching, but I felt the heat from his body, the breath escaping from his lungs to brush against my ear as he regarded me with relief. I’d never sat there with him, and his expression was one of shock and excitement. Leaning my head against the wall and crossing my ankles, I clutched the jewel to my heart and then gazed at him expectantly. I didn’t need to speak. He read the words in my eyes.

“You’ve heard of the Sivatag, right?” His question tumbled out of his mouth. I nodded, and he continued, “The warlord’s camps border the desert. It’s why he’s not easily invaded. A wasteland at his back and an army at his front. For fifty cycles, thieves have been trying to return Varas’ stolen jewels, but they either returned defeated or not at all.”

“The warlord killed them?” I raised my eyebrows.

“And then sacrificed their corpses to the Sivatag,” Kaid confirmed, and I shivered. The final resting place of the twin gods. The stretch of Earth so corrupted by war, an inescapable desert had dried out the land. I wouldn’t want to enter its borders, even as a skeleton.

“I spent three weeks observing his camp,” he continued, and I mentally acknowledged the length of his last absence. He hadn’t been avoiding me. His god had sent him far from my side. “Three long, hot weeks. I don’t know how the warlord lives so close to the desert. Even outside of its border is gods damned unbearable, but I sat there, day in and out, discovering why no thief survived this mission. I learned why no one escaped his hold, and then I saw it. I found my opening.”

Seven

Ialready know where they hid him. A tower so tall that its base rests on the deepest silt and its peak pierces the water’s surface stands in the center of the Vesi. There’ll be no cheating, no shortcuts. It’s a long and dangerous swim, and I know that’s where he was laid to rest. Whether I wade into the water from the beach or travel days to dive off the opposite cliffs, the journey is the same. Open waters and monsters with a taste for human blood.

I stand, naked and tanned, in the sand, the gentle warm waves lapping at my toes. The sun has bronzed my skin. The swimming has strengthened my muscles, and the fruit trees bordering the beach fed my belly. I look healthier than I have since it happened, which makes my heart ache. My reflection stares back at me from the crystal waters, and I hate how my eyes sparkle in the sunlight. I should not look well. I don’t deserve to be healthy. Not while he’s in pieces.

“You’re no good to him ill,” The Stranger’s voice pops into my mind, and I flinch.

“Stay out of my head.”

“I don’t need to be in your head. I can read your thoughts on your face. The color in your cheeks would please him. It does me.”

“That’s why it hurts. He is pale and lifeless, and I am—”

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