Page 20 of The Scattered Bones

“Beautiful.” The Stranger cuts me off. “You should take pride in that. Not because it makes you superior or because it makes you selfish, but because when you find all of him, you’ll be a welcomed sight. Think of how he’ll blame me if you look like a skeleton when he returns.”

“I may be a skeleton after this dive.”

“True.”

“Thanks.” I scoff. “I appreciate the confidence.”

“Someone has to keep you humble, my child. At the rate you’re going, your feats of victory will outweigh the gods’.”

“Do you think they’ve noticed me? What I’m doing?” His comment coils concern in my chest.

“Undoubtedly.” His answer chills me despite the sun’s caress. “But they do not know what I’ve promised you. They simply mock your foolish pursuits.”

“I hope my trust in you is not foolish,” I say. What he’s promised me is impossible, but I’m desperate enough to believe him.

“You shall have to wait and see.”

“Will you send me off with well wishes, at least?” I ask. “Even if they are lies?”

“I don’t need to wish you well.” His melodic voice bathes my mind. “I watched you train these past weeks. Your lungs are strong, your muscles powerful. Swim fast and swim well. Perhaps Udens will take pride in your new skill.”

“Is he here?” I ask. “In these waters? Or do only his monsters dwell in the depths?”

“His soul lingers in every sea, every lake, every ocean and river that dampens this realm. He is here.”

I step further into the water until my ankles are submerged, and I nod. I don’t know what else to say.

“Do not forget,” The Stranger continues. “He allows no harm to come to his children in the Vesi. No matter the darkness, no matter the evil, you must not cause any living creature to suffer. From the smallest fish to the sea plants to the monsters.”

I gesture to my bare body, absent my dagger. I go in alone, not even a garment to shield me.

“Swim swiftly, my child,” he says. “May Udens watch over you.”

“The gods have abandoned me,” I say.

“Have they?” The Stranger asks, and my face burns where Lovec marked me as his own. But we are the same. Both tainted by loss, and as the warm water pulses around my skin, another thought occurs to me.

“May Udens watch over me,” I repeat, the words almost choking me. It’s been so long since I prayed, it feels like a betrayal to him. But Udens didn’t carve him to pieces. No, the god of the sea simply guards him from me.

* * *

The swim is exhausting.Water is everywhere, but there's nothing to drink. The sun beats down on my bare back. The salt stings my lips and eyes. I left the shore at dawn to ensure the daylight granted me her long hours, but as fatigue settles in my bones, I wonder if it’s enough. I don’t want to be trapped floating in the Vesi overnight. Thankfully, some of the sunken city’s roofs loom high, and I’ve found three perches so far to rest upon. I still have to stand, though, my chin just reaching the surface, but they were welcomed reprieves from the endless strokes.

I teeter on one such roof now, catching my breath as I wait for the call of black magic. The darkness draws me to him with a sickening pull, but beneath the sulfur and stench, another thread tugs at my heart. I often wonder if Elskere, the wed gods, stitched it there for me to follow. Most would claim our binding incomplete since tradition dictates the ceremony be held before their altar. Ours was pledged under the moon, but there are no two hearts as woven together as Kaid’s and mine. Except for maybe Elskere, and the burning lines on my face taught me I’m not as forsaken as I once thought. I would like to trust that the wed gods—the husband and wife who forsook their own names to be referred to as a single deity—mourn my loss with me. They are nothing without each other. I am hollow without Kaid, and his fractured spirit calls to me. Begs me to find his severed body.

Something brushes against my bare calf, and I yelp as I throw myself into the water. My panicked eyes snap to the spot I vacated, bracing for my doom, but when I see the slimy creatures that assaulted me, I laugh so hard that I snort salt water up my nose. I sputter unattractively as I swim back to the roof, my toes finding purchase, and a school of neon-colored fish swarms my legs. They weave in and out, dancing in colors and grace. They’re stunning, hues I’ve never seen in all my twenty-two cycles. I wore white trimmed with gold. Kaid always dressed in black, and now I wear what I find or nothing at all. My life has been temples and locked rooms and deadly landscapes, but this? I burst into tears as a pink fish bumps my thigh.

A yellow creature dances around my wrist, and a red one with orange fins nibbles gently on my belly button. My hands move of their own longing, and a blue fish with a bright green friend slip and slide over my fingers. I can’t stop the smile that spreads across my face as the emerald color reminds me of the jewel Kaid stole for me. I left it behind when I fled, but seeing this emphasizes all the precious things I’ve lost.

I simultaneously laugh and sob. “I wish you were here,” I tell him. I wonder if his thieving ever brought him face-to-face with such beauty. I hope it did. His life was filled with violence. His lips. His—I cut that thought off at the root. I can’t think about that day. It destroyed me, and if I let the memory play out, I’ll drown.

My attention returns to the vibrance surrounding me, and an orange and white fish darts through my legs like a spear through the water. His speed carries him far, and as if controlled by one mind, the school surges after him. Their rainbow vision weaves through the waves, leaving me mesmerized but alone.

“Go.”The order comes from nowhere, but it’s not The Stranger’s voice. It’s an instinct, a feeling in my gut urging me to follow the colorful waters, and its urgency is so strong, I cough as if it punched me in the stomach.

Without considering if this impulse is a trap, I dive after the fish, their beauty captivating me in a trance. The farther I swim, the deeper they descend. The longer I chase, the more entranced I grow. Their colors and elegance are the only things I notice. I want to become a part of their lives. I long for my body to shed its flesh and bloom again with neon scales. I do not hear The Stranger banging at the gates, begging for entrance into my mind. I don’t sense his worry wrapping around me. All I see, feel, know is exquisite color. All I desire is to become like them.

The vibrant school dives deeper, their swarming bodies closing in on the sunken city’s center, and I’ve lost all track of the day. I know not what I seek. I exist for this beauty, crave this splendor. My lungs cannot feel the lack of oxygen burning through my chest. My skin doesn’t register the drastic plunge in the water’s temperature. My eyes don’t sense the encroaching darkness. The need to follow is all-consuming.

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