Page 119 of Sinning for Santa

“I don’t know.” I shrug, shifting my stare back to Jaxcen. She looks so innocent when she’s asleep. More so than normal. “I’ve never thought much about it. Never thought I’d find someone I can actually tolerate being around for longer than an hour besides you.”

“Naw, you wanna have kids with me.” Finn mocks and this time I’m the one to throw a punch into his shoulder.

Chuckling, Finn rubs at where my punch landed, before his gaze shifts between me and Jaxcen. “So when you say you became obsessed with the idea of putting a baby inside her, when did that first start?”

“In the chapel,” I mutter.

“And that’s the first time you fucked her, right?”

I nod, and he grins.

“That’s some crazy arse breeding kink.”

“What?” I ask, frowning at him.

“Dude, you need to read some of the books the women order in. Breeding kink is a thing. Look.” He takes out his phone and I watch his screen upside down, as he searches the internet for breeding kink.

“Here it is.” He grins and reads out the meaning. “Breeding kink refers to the intense arousal at the thought of being impregnated or impregnating someone. It means you’re literally turned on by the idea of making her pregnant, but it doesn’t necessarily mean you want to have a child. Like maybe it’s the danger of the possibility that turns you on.”

I consider that.

“Nope.” I shakemy head. “I want my baby to grow inside her and I want him or her to have my eyes and her smile and…” I trail off.

Holy shit, is that really what I want?

“Fuck, man. That’s more than a kink. Is it possible you love her?”

“What? No. I’ve known her for four fucking days,” I snap, looking at him like he’s grown two heads this time, but he just shrugs.

“Crazier things have happened.”

I want to argue that it’s beyond crazy that I could love Jaxcen. That love at first sight is a bullshit concept created to sell movies and books, but what else could this be? Just an infatuation?

“You think that could actually be a thing? Maybe I have a brain tumour or something.” I frown and Finn chuckles.

“You don’t have a fucking brain tumour. But given what you’ve told me, maybe you should keep her for a bit longer. See where it goes.”

“I don’t want to take her from one prison and lock her in another.” I point out.

“Dude. This place isn’t a prison. Hell, she’d probably really like it here if she knows she can come and go as she pleases.”

“That’s just it. As mine. She can’t. She’d need protection everywhere she went.”

“So what?” Finn shrugs, standing to clap me on the shoulder, “Griffin made it work with Aggie.” He reminds me about my cousin Griffin and the woman he lured into a Christmas game that was borderline stalkerish.

Hell, it worked. They fell in love and got married.

Is that something I can even consider?

Hold up.

Marriage?

What the fuck am I thinking about?

“You wanna leave the town locked down for Chrissy Eve?” Finn asks, bringing me out of my spiralling thoughts.

“No.” I shake my head. “We operate as usual, but double the guards. Put them in plain clothes and Santa suits. I want them undercover and on the lookout while we have our gates open to outsiders.”