Page 51 of Without You

I want to ask what he means, but I’m too scared to hear the truth. I’m scared to have anything rattle this tentative friendship we have blossoming between us.

Cheers from Denise and Anthony interrupt us, and Keri and Peter come over to hand us their cues.

“Hey, man,” Peter greets. “I’m Peter.”

“I’m Deacon.”

“How good are you guys, because I hope you kick their cocky asses.”

Leaning closer to Julian, I whisper in his ear. “I’m going to kill you if we lose.”

“I think it will be your fault,” he says through clenched teeth and a stiff smile. “You’re the one that can’t play.”

Not leaving it to chance, I point between Keri and Peter. “Which one of you wants to take my place?”

Keri’s eyes sparkle with mischief as she squeezes Peter on the shoulder. “Why don’t you play, Petey. I’m going to take care of Deacon.”

I hand him the cue, immediately foreshadowing the subtle let down that will eventually take place. He gives me a smirk. “Good luck with that one. She’s like a dog with a bone.”

Julian just laughs at me, mouthing the word ‘chicken’ and flapping his arms like one.

I pretend to scratch the bridge of my nose with my middle finger and he just laughs at me, his face splitting in two, his whole smile lighting up the room.

Having never been able to rid myself of the image of him lying lifeless on his bed, I get a real kick out of seeing him smile. Happiness suits him.

Keri and I are sitting in a cluster of stools, while the others become invested in the game. She doesn’t waste any time, her plan of attack is in motion from the second her ass hits the seat.

“So, Julian told me you’re single.”

She leans in close, her arm resting on my shoulder. Normally she would be exactly my type for a one-night stand. The ultimate distraction; brunette, tight, firm body that would wrap around mine perfectly while I rammed into her recklessly.

But even with her low-cut blouse and perky tits being thrust into my face every time she gets the chance, my dick doesn’t twitch. I’m not even shocked at this point.

I know what’s caught my attention. He’s about six feet tall, a lean swimmer’s body, and I’m staring at him like he’s the second coming of Jesus Christ. Watching the way he walks around the table, taking in his every stance, his posture. I’m noticing his myriad facial expressions, the way he talks with his hands, the way he looks over at me from the corner of his eye every time Keri touches me.

“Oh my god,” Keri gasps. “Are you gay?”

“What?” I intend to sound offended by her assumption, but even my subconscious sees there’s no point in lying. I may not be gay, but I am unashamedly staring at Julian.

“I’ve been shamelessly flirting with you,” Keri continues. “And you haven’t even looked at me sideways, and I’m fucking hot.”

I chuckle at her bluntness. “You’re more than hot, babe, but I’m just not interested. Hasn’t that happened to you before?”

She stands up, and maneuvers herself between my open legs, her body subtly swaying; whatever alcohol she’s drinking is hitting her hard.

“Look at me,” she says lazily, while waving her hands up and down her upper body. “Who wouldn’t want this?”

Grabbing her hand, I drag her back to the stool, guiding her to sit back down. “Keri, you are beautiful.”

“I know,” she huffs, eventually sitting down.

Tucking her hair behind her ear, I place my finger underneath her chin and raise her head, till her eyes meet mine. “It’s not you. It’s me.”

“Of course it’s you,” she says confidently. “But are you sure you’re not gay? You and Julian aren’t a thing?”

“What makes you say that?”

She raises a knowing eyebrow. “You’re looking at him instead of me.”

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