Page 64 of A Virgin for the Ruthless Duke

He was perfect. Why, then, was she not happy? Why was she reluctant to accept his proposal when it was evidently the answer to all her prayers?

“Your proposal is highly welcomed, My Lord,” she said at last, noting the relieved smile on his face. “However, I will need time to think about it.”

“Take all the time you need, Lady Selina,” he said with a smile. “But please do not take too long. I might grow a bit impatient.”

That was another reason why the man was a perfect gentleman. He was unlike the ones that made up most of the ton, who believed that they were nature’s gift to women and, as such, should be prostrated to.

In contrast, Peter was a unique blend of humility and confidence, and his offer would have been attractive if she were not so romantically entangled with a certain stubborn duke.

“Please keep in touch,” he said with a bow. “I look forward to a positive response.”

With that, he walked away, leaving her to the privacy of her thoughts.

At some point, Martha had retreated while they were speaking. But just as quietly as she had disappeared, she reappeared.

“Why did you do that?” she asked, a thoughtful look on her face.

“Do what?” Selina asked innocently.

“You tried to scare off the Earl!”

“Why would I want to do that?” she retorted.

“Because you are afraid,” Martha said quietly, a shrew look on her face.

Suddenly, Selina felt naked in front of her aunt, as if the woman could see into her soul just by looking at her. The sensation was not comfortable, and Selina squirmed in embarrassment.

“You are afraid to give him the chance to love you because you won’t be available to wait on your lover.”

“That is not—” Selina started defensively.

“Please do not lie to me. I have seen the looks the two of you exchange when you think no one is looking.”

Selina deflated at that comment. So much for being discreet.

“Oh, you thought I would not know? Dear girl, your room is just across from mine, and I am a light sleeper. I always knew when you snuck off to see him. I did not comment on it because I wanted you to be happy, and I trusted that you had a good head on your shoulders. I support love—young love, especially—but I must be frank with you, dear Selina,” Martha said, raising her hand to tuck an unruly lock of dark hair behind her niece’s ear.

“Your Duke might be a little too damaged to ask for your hand. I do not blame him, what with the parents he had. I know he might be scared and overwhelmed by the intensity of his feelings for you. Unfortunately, there is little you can do about it. It is a path he must walk alone, but you cannot allow him to waste your productive years, both for your sake and Diana’s. Peter is a nice enough man with a good moral compass. You will be happy with him. But in the end, it is your choice to make. I can only offer guidance. Good night, sweet girl,” she said, patting Selina’s shoulder before leaving her to her thoughts.

No one had told Selina that navigating the marriage mart might be so treacherous. This was harder than learning to conjugate verbs in Latin. Her father had given her the best education, but even that could not save her from her dilemma.

She was caught between two men—one that she loved and one that wanted to marry her. And while it pained her, there seemed to be only one way to settle the matter. It might be best to marry Peter and hope that her interest in him might turn into love and affection. But what would happen to her heart?

To do what she wanted to do, she had to, first of all, stop thinking about Richard. Stop imagining and dreaming of his hands on her body and how exquisite they had felt.

She had to cure her addiction to the man if she had any hope of marrying Peter. Because while she was willing to be pragmatic, she did not think it was fair to marry one man while imagining another man as her husband. It would be cruel to a good man like Peter, and frankly, she would feel terrible for it.

Even now, she could still remember what it felt like to stand in Richard’s arms and flirt with him. To watch the gleam in his eyes as they bantered on the dance floor, all the while dreaming of his kisses and wishing they were alone. She was even going to suggest it before the music ended and Richard bade her farewell, wishing her the best in her endeavors.

It had felt like a bucket of cold water thrown over her, bringing her to her senses with stinging clarity. While Richard embodied the qualities of a good gentleman, he was also ruthless in his ability to torment her.

It was cruel of him to devastate her body and senses so frequently that she was positive he had tied her to himself in ways that were not easy to see. She had fallen irrevocably in love with him, but he had found it quite easy to walk away from her. She had wanted to scream at him for the emotional turmoil he was forcing her through, even though he had never made her any promises.

She had made the unfortunate mistake of assuming that their feelings were enough to make him marry her. But Richard seemed even more wary of matrimony than he was of losing her love and attention. She had assumed that their feelings would be enough, and no matter how it pained her to admit it, she had set herself up for heartbreak by doing that.

Perhaps if Richard saw that Peter was interested in marrying her, he might be motivated to toss his excuses out the window and marry her. But the selfishness in that thought stopped her short.

Was she truly willing to take advantage of an innocent man’s sincerity to make an insincere man jealous?

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