Page 204 of Finding Hope

“I wanna come in!” She bangs on the door with fighter’s fists. “I wanna go out on a date.”

I’m on my feet before my brain catches up to my body.

Swinging the door wide open, I glare at my not yet thirteen-year-old niece. “Bring him to meet me first. You won’t wanna date the little shit after you watch him cry.”

She rolls her eyes. “Not boys, Uncle Jack. That’s disgusting. I meant you.”

“Me? Me, what?”

“I wantyouto take me out on a date. Ice-cream sounds good; it’s hot as shit out here today.”

Scrubbing my hands over my face, I sigh. “Don’t say shit, Evelyn.”Yes, I get the hypocrisy. No, I don’t care.“Your mom will kill us both.”

“I won’t say shit if you take me out for ice-cream. I really want some, but Mom said she’s too busy with Biggie right now.”

Sounds like Mom’s getting laid and being sneaky about it by sending her daughter over here.

“I bet if you lookedrealhard, you’d find ice-cream in someone’s freezer. I betcha anything Aunt Tink has some.”

“She doesn’t. I checked. We watched movies and ate it all last night. I went to bed and dreamed of ice-cream sundaes.” She grins foolishly. “It was amazing.”

“You’re a bunch of fatties.” Turning away from the door, I go back to my sparsely furnished living room. I have a couch and a TV downstairs. I have a bed and a toilet upstairs.

That’s about it.

I can’t say I’ve been all that enthusiastic about decorating.

I don’t know how Bambie would like a home decorated – though I bet she’d lean toward Metallica band posters on the walls – and, well, if she’s not here to choose with me, which is the only time I’d get enthusiastic about decorating a home, then I guess it ain’t happening.

Less cleaning for me to do.

Evie follows me in and stops at the floor to ceiling windows. Tugging the heavy drapes open, she sends dust flying through the rays of blinding sunlight. “Do you know Beauty and the Beast, Uncle Jack?”

“Disney? Sure.”

“You remind me of the Beast.”

I turn back and frown. “How so?”

“You’re always sitting in the dark, sulking like a big grumpy bear.”

“Oh.”Damn.“I was hoping it was because I was brave and handsome like the prince.”

“You’re not brave!” she scoffs. “Brave people get up and go into the sun. They make things happen. Brave people donotsulk.”

“Jesus, Smalls.” Walking toward her, my already pained heart breaks just a little bit more. If I can’t be Bambie’s prince, then the least I can hope for is for my niece to think of me as strong and brave. “You know how to cut a guy down. That hurt.”

Her hard eyes soften instantly. “I’m sorry, Uncle Jack. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” Her bottom lip wobbles. “I can be a real jerk sometimes. I don’t think about people’s feelings before I say mean things.”

“Hey.” I step the last few feet between us and I pull her against mychest. My left arm is still in a sling, so I use my right arm to squeeze her extra tight. “Don’t cry, Bug. Being honest isnota flaw. You’re so brave. Braver than you’ll ever know. Being honest is brave, baby. A trait that a lot of grown-ups are too cowardly to grasp.”

“But I hurt feelings.”

“It only hurts because it’s true. Iama coward; you’re right.”

“Miss T isn’t a bitch.”

“No, baby, she’s not. She’s brave, too. Super brave. And she knows you’re sorry. She knows you didn’t mean it.”

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