Page 22 of Broken By It

We spend the day in this easy way together. The three of us, splashing, smiling, and sliding. Hours pass and I find myself a bit sad as I notice the time.

“I don’t know about you, Hollis, but that peanut butter and jelly isn’t holding me over anymore. I’m hungry,” I tell my son as Maritza sorts through his bag getting dry clothes for him to change into.

“Chicken nuggies,” he requests which I knew was coming.

“Let’s go to the bathroom and change. We can get some nuggies at the golden arches on the way home.”

He shakes his head, “I want Zizi’s special sauce.”

She laughs, “hey, that’s our secret sauce,” she teases.

He looks to me, “it’s daddy, he won’t tell.”

We all laugh as I take him by the hand to guide us to the bathroom to change with Maritza following us to head into the women’s side. We all change and head to my truck. Maritza gets Hollis set up in his car seat like a professional while I stand back waiting to shut her door behind her.

This is by far the easiest day I’ve had since Hollis was born. How can one woman be a real partner making things flow naturally and another make every breath a challenge?

NINE

MARITZA

One Year Later

“Girl’s night!”Maritza chants while Dia applies her lip gloss.

“It’s been far too long,” I tell them both. We used to regularly have girls’ night. Whether we stayed home and did face masks, went to a movie, or out to a night club, we had this usual time together. Life gets in the way sometimes though and I miss this time with my girls.

With work, mom’s treatment schedule, and having Hollis, I haven’t been able to go out with my sister and Dia in what feels like forever. Thankfully, the treatment worked. Mom’s cancer is in remission. She will have to have more frequent doctor’s appointments for screenings than the average person, but this battle is behind us. Given it was just a few years ago we had been given what felt like a death sentence, I have trouble not being anxious. For now, we are celebrating this time of her health.

Fuck cancer.

We won.

This round, at least. It’s scary to think about what remission actually means for her and the statistics on her future. I can’t allow myself to get swallowed up in what things look like ahead. I have to embrace this time and this win. After a trying battle that lasted years, she is beginning to get back to herself. Luckily, she hasn’t pushed herself too hard. She works when she feels up to it and outside of that, she stays home to rest.

I manage the mini storage office for the day to day. Since I’m in school for accounting, I have converted all the Hellions businesses over to the software tax professionals use and I’m managing that for all revenue streams the club has. Well, the business side of things. This is my last year of school, and I will have my degree. It doesn’t change anything; I love my job. I won’t be seeking an opportunity outside of the office. I know the Hellions have different revenue streams. My education has allowed me to streamline their processes for billing, accounts receivable, payable, and most importantly, taxes. No one wants to deal with an audit from Uncle Sam.

I’m sure the club has outside jobs that are cash transactions and I have zero connection with any of it. What the Hellions do is club business. I learned a long time ago, unless you have that cut and those rockers, it’s not your place to be in the know.

For me, it’s a win-win, I get a good salary and work experience in my field. I love my job and truly feel immensely blessed in life. The only thing missing is a partner to share it with.

Hollis is away for the weekend with Dillon on a camping trip. This means Anna won’t be doing any surprise drop offs. Although, we have all been going through an adjustment the last couple of months, I miss Hollis, but this break is also nice too. Change is hard. Even though, I’m not directly involved, the indirect impact as a caregiver to Hollis has left even me feeling the impact of a marriage failing. While I am not privy to thedetails, I know both Dillon and Anna have come to terms with the dissolution of their relationship as husband and wife.

Dillon and Anna have divorced. Surprisingly, she asked him to use an earlier separation date from his moving out date in order to allow the process to complete faster. Honestly, that blew me away after she pushed for a contract marriage for what felt like an eternity. She even tried to get me to talk him into it. I didn’t, but the woman is fierce about getting things her way. It seems like once she accepted the divorce was no longer optional, she moved forward without putting up a fight. I don’t know if that’s because Dillon gave her the house while he still pays the mortgage or the child support, he’s offered being above the state requirement. Whatever happened, she has embraced her new life as a single mom. I don’t ask either of them questions, but Anna has shared about the mortgage and child support. She also doesn’t hesitate to tell me Dillon has been more than fair to her in the split. At least she can give him credit for something.

Dillon lives in small beach house down the street from our condo complex. They split time with Hollis pretty evenly. Since Dillon does work full time in the garage, Anna has Hollis on the weekdays and Dillon has the weekends. I pick Hollis up from school on Friday’s and Dillon takes him back to school on Monday mornings. Anna picks him up from school Monday through Thursday and he spends the night with her unless she calls me to get him. Which it doesn’t happen often since she’s only got him the four afternoons and nights. Summer is a little different because he spends his days with me at the office and goes home with Dillon. She gets him every other weekend when she wants him.

I’m surprised to see the change in her. Since the divorce, she takes time with Hollis when she has it. While there are times, she needs me to have him, it isn’t like these past five years where he was with me more than her. Honestly, he sort of spends equaltime with all of us now. She has a job as a waitress on the times she doesn’t have Hollis. In the summer, she surprised me by how much she worked since she didn’t have Hollis as much. I think this job has given her a new outlet and independence. She seems lighter and less tense to be around.

Our system is unique, but it works. Hollis is thriving and we’re all balancing it out between us. Both Dillon and Anna stop to ask me about keeping him. More than that, they both are willing to let me see him even outside of the windows in which they need a babysitter. There was a penguin adventure at the aquarium. It fell on Anna’s weekend, but also while Dillon was scheduled off at the garage and he wasn’t on a transport. I thought for sure one of them would say no and step in to take them on their own. They didn’t though. Both agreed I have a special bond with Hollis and none of us want that to change, thankfully. They could shut me out and they don’t.

Finishing dolling up, we head out to the local club. It’s a smaller joint, but a great place to listen to music, dance, drink, and have a good time with friends.

“Time to let loose,” Dia says before taking a large drink of her margarita.

We all drink up and the night passes on with laughs amongst us. It’s nice because none of us are really heavy drinkers or wild. We all prefer to stay home more than go out. Although these occasions are nice when we have them.

“Last drink of the night,” our bartender says putting another set of margaritas in front of us. I look at my watch and sure enough it’s two in the morning. Last call so they can close. Dia sends the text for our ride while we finish our drinks.

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