Page 19 of Born in the Spring

“You sit down. Drink.”

I shift back with the order, smiling at her stern stare, then finish off my cocoa, giving her a teasingwhat nowexpression.

“Now rest,” she answers to it, and I smile at this order too as Vanessa sets down her beer and continues our talk over work and living arrangements now that I’m back.

“You’ll need it since you wanna get right to work tomorrow.” There’s a complaint in her tone for my turning down a girls’ day, but I need to get busy.

I first got into working with kids in my mid-twenties, after always working behind a desk. The man I had been dating for two years at the time put the idea in my head once he started bringing up kids.Ushaving them. But I was still unsure if I wanted evenone. So I thought trying out taking care of other people’s kids would help me decide.

All I learned was that I enjoy taking care of other people’s kids. I love being a nanny. And that was fine with me.With me.

I filled my free time with the odd nanny job before I found Blue Cornelia, the best environment to nanny full-time. I was starting over. I needed something stable to build my life around, and I found that here.

“Which you’re letting me do,” I say to Amie with another look, this one more pointed, but soft with the asking.

She sets down her mug. “I’m just saying you can take a couple days if you want them.”

“I don’t.” I take her hand, still cool even after holding a warm mug, and squeeze, hoping she can feel in my fingers and see in my stare that while I need their presence, I need some normal, and I need to help.

She squeezes back and that settles me more.

“Little Skylarhasalready been asking about you,” Vanessa says after a drink, somewhat begrudgingly, and my smile is small as I think of that sweet five-year-old’s cute chubby cheeks. His father said he never grew out of them.

“His newly single daddy’s been asking about you too,” Vanessa adds, around another drink, and I snap her a look, my pulse skipping.

Amie knows the reasons behind my being with Davis and that our relationship—if you can call it one—wasn’t serious. But I don’t know how she would take openly discussing a man,any man, who I could become serious with, on this same mountain, under her same roofs, like I had with her son.

But before I can look at Amie and gauge her reaction, a clang rings out from the back, and she gasps out Jasper’s name.

“I’m fine, Mom,” he assures her in a holler, sticking his head around the frame. “Fine,” he says lower, his eyes drifting to mine before he releases a sigh and ducks out of sight.

Amie lays her hand on mine, pulling my gaze to hers, an understanding sadness gleaming in her eyes. “You’re a part of this family. Always.” She pats at my fingers as I inhale a tighter breath, tucking those words away in my heart for if or when I’ll need them.

“What about me?” Vanessa asks before chugging the last of her beer.

“Depends on the day for you,” Amie teases, and we share a chuckle as Vanessa gives a playful eye roll and a slam of her bottle to the bar.

“I’m tapped out. Jasper,” she calls. “One more!”

He walks over already holding a bottle, and she holds both her arms out like he’s about to pass off a baby instead of a drink. “Thanks, bud,” she says, popping the cap with the opener at her other side.

Jasper makes the tiniest face at the term, but quickly recovers with a teasing, “ThanksJasper. That’s not a bud.”

“Nor is it light,” Vanessa says back with a smile and a sip.

Jasper’s hauling off her empty bottle, and the empty mugs before I can grab mine to take it myself. But I reach for it anyway, and he swings it out of my range, walking backward with a gibing grin. “My mom said to rest.”

I match his look, giving it sideways to Amie as I say, “Sheisthe boss.” Then I watch Jasper walk off, a furrow formingon my face at his rush, again, at how the smile has vanished too when he glances back once before he’s out of sight.

“So where do you want to stay?” Amie asks me, the words somewhat hesitated, and in my own hesitation, Vanessa answers for me.

“With me,” she says. “My roommate just got her own place off the mountain last week, so you can replace her.”

“Do you still get nighttime snack cravings?” I ask with a side stare, raising a brow in accusation, and shehmphsas she swallows some beer.

Back when we lived in employee housing together, before I moved in with Shepherd, Vanessa would wake me up throughout the night with her cravings, the smell rousing me and making it hard to get back to sleep. We had fun, and I love her, but I’ve learned.

I’ve already thought about this, mostly on the way up, and I’ve decided.

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