But even in marriage there are phases. Eras of sorts. When one closes, another begins.
They start to feel like lifetimes.
It’s been years since the night she passed away. Since I helped her parents bury her. Since her mom sat me down and told me that they would be there for me through anything.
Since then, everything has changed.
Leo comes up to me, slapping me on the chest as the crowd roars.
It’s time to start living this one.
36
HEIDI
Idecided to take Briar up on her offer to join them for the football game.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to.
The crowd goes crazy as Leo barrels through the opposing team’s defense, somehow getting a first down.
They’ve been struggling a little tonight, but the star of the show has been Emmett.
With a couple of sacks already in the first half, his performance has been almost unheard of, and it makes me wish I could strap on some pads and get out there, tackling men to take out my anger too.
Amara sits on one side of me, Mila on the other, and both keep looking at me from the corner of their eyes, which is frankly making me anxious. My hands start kneading each other, my shoulders slumping more and more.
Finally, I can’t take it anymore.
“Are you guys okay?” I snap as they sit back down at the end of halftime.
They look at each other. “We’re just concerned about you, that’s all,” Mila says.
Amara nods, stuffing her face with nachos.
“We got in a fight the other night, alright? There’s nothing to be concerned about. I’m fine. I just probably should have stayed home.”
“Youknowthat those are the times we need to drag you out kicking and screaming,” Amara rolls her eyes. “You’re better than sitting at home moping while we’re all here. I don’t even like football. None of them are hot. I don’t understand any of it and I don’t care to. I’m just here for the vibes and you should be too.” She looks down at her lap. “And the nachos. Honestly, this fake ass cheese? Scrumptious.”
My anxiety only got worse, rolling over my shoulders like a wave, and I feel around for my necklace. Closing my eyes, I take a couple of deep breaths, steadying my energy.
The boys ended up winning, but it was a nail biter. It seemed like Emmett was really the only one who truly came to play, which was a little confusing. The guys have been in high spirits and for whatever reason there’s something holding them back.
Everyone but Emmett, it seems. The defense seems to be doing alright, but even most of them could be better.
“This isn’t a Super Bowl team,” Isla mutters from behind me, worrying her lip. She’s been in a particularly foul mood all night.
“Everything okay?” I ask, grabbing her hand.
“Yeah. I just really want them to make it in the playoffs. I want the experience of going and having fun, you know?”
Isla had missed a lot of the playoffs because she and Owen hadn’t been talking.
“You don’t think they’ll make it?”
She shrugs. “I hope they get their shit together but if they keep playing like this then no, they won’t. Leo still looks a little rusty out there, like he’s not trusting his leg. He’s perfectly fine. I get it though.” She sighs. I don’t have to know much about sports and sport-related injuries to know that it’s probably really scary to get back out there after one.
“I think they’ll come back,” I assure her with a squeeze of her hand.