Page 23 of Against the Current

Trisha hesitated and wrung her hands. “Lemons,” she said, surprising him.

“Lemons?” When had Trisha ever used lemons for anything? Or was she just trying to get him out of the house?

“I want to make lemon tea,” she said.

“Okay.” With a nod, Ryan backed into the foyer and removed his keys from his pocket. His heart thundered. When he left and got into his car, he sat for a moment, remembering that long-ago day in this very driveway when Trisha had first told him she was pregnant. His grandfather had been dead for only a few days. He still remembered how exhilarated he’d felt. He thought he’d be a family man who everyone respected. But now, he wasn’t sure anyone respected him. He wasn’t even sure he respected himself.

Driving into town was a funny thing. He felt at once seventeen and forty-one. When he reached the grocery store, he inspected the people milling through the parking lot, looking for someone he recognized. He imagined getting out and throwinghis arms around them, saying,Gosh, it’s so good to be home!He imagined them laughing at his slight Chicago accent.

After a long time, he got out of the car and went inside. Nobody looked at him. The temperature had dropped, and more snow was on the horizon. Everyone wanted to get home before it started.

But when he neared the big glass door of the grocery store, something incredible happened.

A man appeared. He carried a bouquet and wore a thick hand-knitted hat the color of mustard. When he saw Ryan, he nearly dropped the flowers.

Ryan gasped as the man came closer. Overhead, the clouds opened, and snow began to fall softly, dotting his cheeks.

“Dad?”

Josh Lewis looked the same—smiley and tan and broad. Wearing the same thick coat he always wore every winter going back as far as Ryan could remember, he resembled a lumberjack. Suddenly, he stood in front of Ryan with his arms outstretched, and he hugged Ryan so tightly that Ryan felt like a kid again.

“I know this is breaking the rules,” Josh said. “You wanted a day to yourself.”

Ryan laughed and stepped back to look at him. “It was a stupid rule.”

“You’re telling me.” Josh looked mystified. “What do we do now? Do I report that I’ve seen you back at headquarters?”

Ryan knew his mother would be painfully jealous if she knew Josh had seen Ryan before she had. But suddenly, all he wanted in the world was to sit with his father in a bar and tell him everything on his mind. All he wanted was to release himself from the pain and torment of the past few years.

“How long do you have?” Ryan asked.

Josh laughed again. “For you, Son? I have all the time in the world.”

Ryan suggested they mosey down the road to get a quick beer.

“Trisha won’t be angry with you?” Josh asked.

Ryan didn’t want to say the truth. He was sure Trisha didn’t care if Ryan lived or died.

He said, “Trisha’s busy unpacking. She won’t even notice.”

Josh raised his bouquet. “Should we drive together or separate?”

“Let’s walk,” Ryan suggested.

Josh clapped Ryan on the shoulder and shook him, his eyes dancing with happiness. “I get to go for a walk with my son,” he announced to everyone in the parking lot. “It’s the best day in history.”

Chapter Nine

June 2010 - Nantucket Island

From where she stood in her childhood bedroom, Jackie had the sensation she could see and understand everything. Out the back window was the wide stretch of frothing blue water that made up the Nantucket Sound, the long glistening strand of the beach, the lawn where her children once played and screamed and made snow angels, and the back patio where she’d burned her shoulders tanning as a teenager. But through another window, the smaller one on the side, she could see more still. Her only son and his new wife were embracing and crying like the world was on the brink of collapse. To Jackie, the world had already ended. Her father was dead. What were they smiling about?

It was hard not to think of Trisha as the villain who had brought about the downfall of the Sutton Family—only four days after the wedding.

If only they hadn’t gotten married. If only Dad hadn’t been dressed in a suit and overexerting himself. If only he hadn’t drunk champagne.

Jackie was dressed in a simple black dress. It was brand new and stiff and a little too large, perhaps because she’d been on such a strict diet before the wedding and had promptly stopped eating after her father’s heart attack. There she stood, glaring down at her son, daring him to look up at her and see. But no. He was hugging and kissing Trisha again. They were talking about something with more enthusiasm than Jackie had ever seen. Didn’t Ryan remember that they’d just buried his grandfather?

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