Page 89 of Deserter

He mashed his lips into a flat line and nodded, before throwing open the door to come get me. His words had filled me with a strange hope, because I knew something that even he didn’t.

Regardless of what he said, Jamie Quinn knew how to love.

The man was crazy about his son.

And it gave me faith that one day, he might feel the same about me.

Chapter Nineteen

Grey: 1990

“Would it have killed you to pick someone I wasn’t related to already? When you said godparents, I had someone tall, dark, and handsome in mind for the godfather role,” Molly whispered loudly as we made our way through the vestibule of the church.

“Jesus fuck, Molly. We were chosen to be spiritual role models for Kate,” Wolverine growled under his breath.

I shot Celia a look and she mashed her lips together to hide her grin before ushering Molly over to a bench.

“You gonna teach her language like that, o wise spiritual advisor?”

Wolverine chuckled and adjusted the collar of his shirt. “Just the ones she’s not hearing from you. Is it me or is it fuckin’ hot in here?”

I grinned. The old church was much warmer than it should’ve been, given the weather outside, but it didn’t mean I wasn’t going to have a little fun with him. “Just you, old man. Maybe your sins are catching up with you. Hell, you just might spontaneously combust before we even make it inside.”

The sound of Celia’s laughter traveled over to us, drowning out Wolverine’s smart-ass reply, along with the chances of me paying a damn bit of attention to anything other than her.

She fussed with Kate’s massive christening gown and bonnet while grinning over something Molly had said. The gown had been in Celia’s family for a hundred years or some shit like that and damn near dragged the ground, making Kate look even smaller than she already was.

I hadn’t looked at my wife the same since she brought our little girl into the world six weeks ago. I thought I was tough, but she’d delivered Kate like a fucking warrior.

“I’ll be damned, son. Never thought I’d live to see the day.”

“See what, old man?” I asked distractedly, eyes still on her. “A biker inside an old Catholic church?”

I felt naked without my kutte, but even I respected the power of the Almighty and left it in the Suburban. I bought the SUV for Celia after Kate was born when I realized we were going to need a bigger vehicle.

I held onto the Cavalier though. Maybe someday it would be Kate’s. After I replaced the passenger seat, of course.

Wolverine clapped a hand against my shoulder with a grin. “The day you fell ass over teakettle for a woman. You love her.”

I let out a rough bark of laughter. “Love? The fuck you talkin’ about?”

He crossed his arms over his chest and stared me down. “Drop the shit, Jamie. I’ve seen the way you look at her, like she holds your salvation in the palm of her fuckin’ hand.”

He wasn’t wrong. My feelings for Celia had only grown stronger since Kate was born, running deep within my veins. I’d always assumed that marriage would feel like a noose around my neck, but the last six weeks had proven me wrong.

I enjoyed spending time with her, even though most nights, she got Kate down only to pass out beside me on the couch. But just being near her was enough to drown out the war that raged inside my brain.

Love?

I’d gone two and a half decades without it and done just fine. It was a word; a lie that poor fucks wrapped themselves up in when they wanted to feel safe and warm.

Safety itself was just another illusion.

I could protect the people in my life, or I could sit around and talk about bullshit feelings while the wolves scratched at the door.

I’d chosen to let my actions speak for me.

“I’m not,” I began, losing my train of thought when Celia tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before pressing a kiss to Kate’s little forehead.

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