Page 75 of Beauty and the Beard

“I’ve been called worse. But I got you what you need and I’ll show you what to do. You can check in on youramourassoonas we get in the truck.”

Walking back to the truck with a much lighter wallet, Perry opens the packages and sets up my charger.

“It will take a few minutes for it to have enough juice to pick up the signal and notify you of the missed messages. But back to what we were talking about earlier. Be honest, if Sasha hadn’t said he needed space or whatever, what would you be doing right now?”

Perry sets my phone, now connected to a charger and showing the very red, and very drained, battery signal, in my cup holder.

“I’d probably be calling him and if he lived closer, asking him on a date. Maybe take him to the city to that big book store. And he loves clothes, so I’d offer to go to the outlet place. You know the one Millie says her daughters buy all the fancy purses at? I’d take him there. We’d get ice cream at the creamery and he might like a walk along the riverfront.”

I abruptly stop my word vomit and look at Perry.

“I didn’t realize I’d thought about it so much. What does that mean?”

“Maybe that you want him in your life and you’re ready to make it happen.” He shrugs. “Or maybe you’re just obsessed.”

My phone buzzes. One after another of missed texts pop up. Perry stops my hand when I reach for it.

“Just let it keep going for a minute and look at me.”

The soft tone of his voice draws my full attention to my normally brash and in your face little brother.

“I don’t want to pry or upset you. I told you how I felt when we took Sasha out. You were back. The Leaf I know and love is back. You’ve even been back at the sugar shack this week. But I want to make sure you understand what Sasha said. Are you sure he wants you to stay away, and it’s not just him hoping for romance? Maybe wishing you’d show up on his doorstep with flowers or something?”

“He’s spent his whole life being told what to do, Perry. Not as a child, as an adult. He was taken advantage of and… used. There’s no other way to say it. He has such a distorted sense of himself and reality. Sasha came here to find his independence and to just… try to be normal. Do things of his choosing.”

I smile, remembering how excited he was to chop a piece of wood. Something I’ve done my whole life without considering if it was okay or if I was allowed to do it.

“And I don’t want to share many details, but I know there were issues in the bedroom with others. Like… I think the men he was with just treated him as something to fuck. They didn’t see him as a person or really make him feel cared for. It’s hard for him to let people in.”

Perry nods with a sad smile.

“I’m sorry. That’s a shitty way to feel. So you don’t want to overstep then? Is that it?”

“As much as I want to run to him and tell him we need to give us a shot, I can’t go to him when he asked me not to, Perry. That’s not listening or caring about his voice and he’s had too much of that.”

He gestures to the cell phone. “You want to call him and I’ll take a walk so you can have privacy?”

“No. I’ll send him a text right now and call him at home.”

Perry accepts that and leans back as I scroll through all the texts from Sasha before sending one to say I’d be calling shortly. But before I can text, I stop and read the last message.

Beauty:I miss you. Call me when you’re free?

I’m probably jumping to conclusions about what it means, but I hastily reply and spin my tires before leaving the parking lot.

“Must have been a good text.” Perry chuckles.

“It was, and I dare to hope it means there’s more to come. In the meantime, tell me how I can be romantic when he’s six hours away from me.”

Perry sits up and rubs his hands together.

“I’m so glad you asked. I have ideas.”

And for the next twenty minutes, my brother tells me lots of ideas.

And they’re actually pretty good.

Chapter 22

---