Page 46 of My Saintly Demon

“When I found a balance and prayed the way I wanted to, it did.”

“Maybe you could teach me how one day?”

“Because you want help to sleep or for something else?”

He places a kiss on my temple. “Because I… I want to know more about you. And I need to adjust, I suppose. A way to cope with all this stuff. All these feelings.”

I don’t answer for a few moments because I know Dave is searching for words. His swallows are loud in the quiet of night, even with the random cicadas hum. I don’t know what he wants to say, but I know what I hope he says.

“My father will be here tomorrow. Would you meet him with me?”

“Of course. I’ll be there if you need support. Is he, I mean, will he be okay with me there? I’m not a priest anymore, but he might still get those vibes from me? I don’t know if demons get vibes like that, though. I’m just saying I don’t want him to be uncomfortable with such an important talk.”

Dave’s chest rumbles with laughter against my back and I reposition to straddle him instead.

“Why are you laughing at me?”

“You’re nervous about meeting my dad.”

“Well, he’s some kind of high-ranking demon and I don’t want to embarrass you. I mean, I propositioned you in the kitchen the first time we met. I don’t want to be so bold with your dad.”

“You plan on propositioning my father with me sitting there?”

“What? No! That’s not what I meant at all! I meant, I just don’t want to say something out of line. Like hey your son is amazing and please don’t make him go back. I’ll do whatever you want if he can stay.”

I meant it as a joke, but once the words are in the air, I know it’s true. I don’t want Dave to go when his week is up, and I just might make a deal to have him a little longer. A future without Dave isn’t that appealing.

“Is that what you think? I’m amazing?”

Leaning forward, I touch my forehead to his. “I don’t want you to go.”

Pressing a kiss to his lips, I squeeze my eyes shut and just say what I’ve been thinking. What’s been on my mind since Mike’s comment forced me to examine what’s been happening in my heart.

“I think I love you and I know I might do something stupid if it meant I could keep you longer with me.”

It should feel good to get that off my chest and let him know, but it hurts to breathe the longer he stays silent.

“Chuck…” He puffs out a shaky breath and I try to burrow into him farther. I can’t look him in the eye if he can’t say he’s at least maybe sort of attached to me. I won’t survive another romantic rejection.

He’ll have none of me hiding though and he sits up, effortlessly taking me with him as he scoots to the edge of the lounger. I wrap my legs tighter around his waist and inhale the unique scent of Dave. The oatmeal lotion from earlier mixed with his masculine musk.

Placing his hands on the side of my head, he forces me to look at him.

“I asked him to come earlier because I don’t want to go back.”

“What?”

“I’m not a demon, Charles. I’ll never be what I’m supposed to live up to. But I’m no angel either. I make mistakes and I often blur some lines of what’s bad and good.” His lips touch my forehead and my fingers curl into his shoulders. “The only place I can exist and be who I truly am is here. Where everyone has a bit of demon and angel in them, and I’m not held to some high expectation for either.”

Dave’s blue eyes fix on mine with a fierceness that will forever be seared in my mind.

“This is how you feel, isn’t it? All the things you’ve been doing they taught you are shameful and wrong, and they aren’t. And now that you’re free from the pedestal the church put you on, it’s like this giant yoke on your shoulders has lifted.”

Nodding, I whisper, “Yes. That’s exactly it. For the first time in my life, I’ve been able to be me… and I don’t want to go back to my old life. I’m not afraid to say I find great joy in all the things considered so vile I was trained to wipe them from my thoughts. But I also don’t know what to do going forward.”

“I’ll help you figure it out.” Another kiss, this time deeper and longer, and I melt into him, knowing in my heart of hearts he would. We’re not conventional. There’s nothing normal about any of this. Yet, I can’t imagine anything different now.

Dave groans into my mouth, and his cock thickens beneath me. I wiggle back and adjust on his lap so I can take us both in hand.

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