Page 72 of The Shots You Take

Adam laughed. “Fuck you. My point is that I’m trying to decide whether or not to come out in a big public way. I made a pros and cons list. Look.” He reached to grab his phone off the kitchen counter, then tapped at it before handing it to Riley.

Riley held the phone away from his face, squinted, and read:

Pros

Good role model

Make people think/big fuck you to bigots

No hiding at all

Easier to be in a relationship/date

Would probably feel amazing

Cons

Lots of attention

Lots of pressure?

Could be hard on Lucy and Cole?

I’d have to figure out how to do it/what to say

Hall of Fame?

* * *

Riley handed the phone back. “The Hall of Fame thing really matters to you, eh?”

“Well, yeah. I earned it.”

“You’re right. And I don’t think they’d take your induction away if you came out. I’d cross that one off.”

Adam frowned at his phone, then began tapping. “All right. Deleted. That’s one down.”

“You’ve never been afraid of lots of attention, or lots of pressure,” Riley reasoned. “You were the captain of the fucking Toronto Northmen. That’s plenty of pressure.”

“Different kind of pressure, though.”

“Where would the pressure come from? The queer community? The hockey world? You don’t need to be the World’s Best Gay Man, Shep. There’s no Hall of Fame for it.” Riley hesitated. “Or maybe there is. I don’t know. I’m not online much.”

“Well, I certainly don’t know. At the moment I’m not even going to make the gay playoffs.”

Riley’s lips twitched. “Well, you’re a new expansion to the league.”

Adam’s laugh was full of surprised delight. His nose and eyes crinkled adorably, and Riley let himself look. He let himself enjoy the simple pleasure of making Adam Sheppard laugh.

“I really don’t know what I’m doing,” Adam said. “You should have seen me on my first…date? I don’t know if that’s the right word.”

“Depends,” Riley said with forced mildness.

“I mean, we weren’t really trying to get to know each other. It was pretty…goal oriented.”

This time Riley laughed. “Goal oriented.”

“Yeah. You know.”

---