Page 261 of Keeping 13

“We’re not expecting you to keep anything from Shannon, son,” Dad replied. “We both know you’re a hopeless liar.”

“The cat would be out of the bag in an hour,” Mam agreed, smiling at my father.

I glared at them. “I’m not that bad.”

They both smirked back at me.

“I’mnot,” I defended. “I can lie just fine.”

“Badly,” Mam mused.

“You’re an open book, Johnny,” Dad agreed with a chuckle. “And that’s a good way to be.”

“No, no, no, I pulled the wool over your eyes plenty of times with my adductor,” I argued. “And my doctors, trainers, and half of the Academy.” Mam’s eyes narrowed and I knew I’d shot myself in the foot. “Yeah, that was a bad example,” I muttered sheepishly.You bleeding eejit.“Forget I said anything.”

“The only one you were lying to in that situation was yourself, son,” Dad shot back. “And the only one you were hurting with that lie was also yourself.”

Shoulders sagging, I nodded in defeat. “Yeah, I know.”

“I wanted to have Shannon over for dinner this evening so we could talk to her,” Mam said, thankfully steering the conversation away from my less than stellar discretions. “We wanted to ask her how she would feel about the possibility of coming to live with us.”

I didn’t know about Shannon, but I knew how I felt: fuckingecstatic.

“But this will be a slow process,” Dad said, always the voice of reason in our house. “Don’t lose the run of yourselves here, guys. It’s not going to happen overnight, and they might notwantto be with us. There’s a lot of legal hoops we’ll have to jump through before we come close to crossing that bridge, so keep the head.” He gave Mam a knowing look. “And don’t bulldoze.”

63

Go to Sleep

Shannon

When my mother came in from work earlier and Darren and I explained what had happened at school, she collapsed in a heap on the floor, crying and wailing. After a few minutes of watching my brother trying to console her, I just stepped around them both and went up to my room.

I couldn’t handle her anymore, I realized. The patience I used to be able to call on was depleting at a rapid rate, and every time she cried, I just wanted to scream. I knew that was bad and it made me a terrible person, but I couldn’t help it. I could barely tolerate being in the same room with my mother anymore.

Patricia arrived at the house a little after six o’clock, and by then Darren had managed to get Mam to pull herself together. The social worker had asked all her questions, filled in all her notes, clucked her tongue, snapped her heels, and left shortly after.

Numb, I had returned to my room, clutching my phone and praying for mercy for my brother. Aoife had texted me at least thirty times throughout the evening, asking for updates, and every time I replied with a “nothing yet” a little piece of me died. When ten o’clock came and went, the anxiety I had been feeling all evening skyrocketed to the point where I couldn’t move a muscle.

Mr. Kavanagh said ten o’clock.

It was almost eleven now, and I was still sitting on my bed, watching the minutes tick by, waiting for Joey to come home.

The sound of a key turning in the lock filled my ears, and I sprang off my bed. Pulling out my phone, I typed out a quick text to Aoife.

S: He’s back.

A: Oh thank god… I’m on my way.

Tossing my phone down on my bed, I moved at top speed through the landing and down the staircase. The moment my eyes landed on Joey closing the front door behind him, a huge swell of relief washed over me. Riddled with emotion, I stumbled down the last three steps and threw my arms around him. “You’re back!” I pressed my cheek to his back and exhaled a ragged breath. “Thank god.”

“It’s okay, Shan,” he mumbled, words slightly slurred. Patting the hand that I had wrapped around him, he kept his head down as he slipped around me and moved for the kitchen. “It’s all good.”

“Wait—” Catching ahold of his hand, I pulled him back. “Look at me.”

He didn’t. Fear trickled down my spine.

“Joey.” I pulled harder on his hand. “Look at me.”

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