Page 57 of The Idiot

“You are,” he gasps, pointing at me. “Why are you mad? You didn’t have to help me.”

“You’re being an idiot. I don’t care what you blow.” I do. I absolutely do, but I don’t say that, instead, tugging on a pair of gym shorts.

“Oh, my gosh. You’re going to go work out again. Youaremad!”

“I’m not fucking mad!”

The unconvincing words are out before I can stop them. Eyes wide, his jaw drops. My face is burning. How much more mortification am I going to throw myself into headfirst?

“I don’t get it,” he stammers. “Do you think you’re the only person who can like cock? You said you thought I would freak out when you told me about yourself, but look at you. This is the opposite of supportive.”

“Oh, brother,” I grumble, brushing past him to fetch my tennis shoes and earbuds. “I don’t have a monopoly on cock. Maybe you’re just being annoying.”

“I am not! I’m trying to have a conversation about you not liking me liking cock.”

Can he fucking say‘cock’one more time? For fuck’s sake.

Holding my arms out wide, I explode. “Like all the cock you want. There’s a whole ship full of it here. Go talk to them about it and jerk off all over their bed and in their shower. Whatever it takes to give me some damn peace.”

“Fine!” he huffs. “I will.”

“Fine!” I retort like a child that needs the last word.

“Good,” he counters like that child’s best friend.

Stomping past me, he scoops up his nasty T-shirt, slips into his shoes, and grabs his shorts. I blink at him as he marches to the door. Is he at least going to put his freaking shorts on? Thisis my fault. Now, I’ve sent him out into Gaytoberfest in only his boxers.

Turning at the doorway, his face looks like he just sucked on a lemon. “Have fun being a dick at the gym.”

“Have fun being an annoying cockslut!”

The door slams behind him. I walk to the balcony, slide the door shut behind me, and then I scream.

CHAPTER 17

Jesse

Darnell didn’t give himself enough credit a few days ago on the upper deck. His hands are just as magical as Walt’s. Sitting on the edge of their bed, I stare numbly at their TV as Walt mixes us another round of drinks on the desk by the couch. They’ve got one of the fancy cabins too, but it doesn’t feel like there’s enough room in here to breathe properly since my row with Murph.

The ship rocks violently again, making me tense. I probably shouldn’t be watchingGilligan’s Islandduring a storm on a cruise ship, but I’m a guest, so I don’t think I have a right to complain about which station they chose. Darnell steadies me, clasping a hand on each of my shoulders.

“It’s alright. Just a little choppy out there,” he soothes. “Walt and I have seen worse storms than this. Haven’t we?”

“Oh, yeah. Remember that trip we took to Havana?”

“How could I forget? We were stuck in the harbor for five days.”

“See? Nothing to be worried about. Just relax,” Darnell assures me, going to work on the knots in my shoulders.

I don’t think any number of magic hands, games of chess, or comforting words from the grandpas is going to cure the ache in my chest. Why can’t I do anything right by Murph? He’s always mad at me.

I don’t get it. First, he’s being all patient and humoring my confession about being curious about D-town and the next thing, he’s kicking me out, telling me I’m annoying. Thank goodness he didn’t know what was running through my head during that dildo bj session.

I know he kept speaking in third-person terms during his coaching—‘The guy will let you know what he likes’—but all I could think about was wondering what he likes. All I could focus on was the warmth radiating off his crotch, his hard cock brushing against my face, and the feel of his tuft underneath his boxer briefs. It was… potent. I barely made it out of there alive. I pinched my dick so hard to avoid coming that I probably have fingerprints embedded in it now.

I am such a perv. Who lusts about their best friend while said friend is being kind enough to show you the ropes? He’s just so familiar. I trust him, and Murph’s not a bad-looking guy. I’m only human.

“Here you go. That should help settle your nerves,” Walt says, handing me a cocktail he fashioned from their stash and ice bucket. It even has one of the cute little man stripper straws in it from the show last night. He’s so thoughtful and accommodating.

---