Page 41 of The Accidental Honeymoon

"Fine," I lie. "Totally fine. I want to do… that."

He pulls me into a side hug. "I'll be with you the entire way," he promises. “We’ll both crush it.”

I lean into his warmth, savoring the contact for a few seconds longer than necessary. It’s easy to suck in a deep breath of his natural scent mixed with his cologne. This feeling of not being alone?

Not having the clinging thought that the person I am trying to impress is laughing at me ishuge. I’vehad that several times before, with guys I wanted to date.

The feeling is nice. I could get used to it.

We grab harnesses and try to get into them. I must look like a complete fool trying to put mine on. The harness has twelve straps made of nylon webbing in different colors, and as I wrestle with them, it only becomes less clear what color goes where.

Jay gets his on with little difficulty and then tries to help with mine. “Here, you’ve got this strap backward,” he says. With a certainty that could only belong to a handsome white man, he detangles my harness. “Okay, now step into this loop.”

I let him manipulate my body for half a minute while I give him the stink eye. “Aren’t you supposed to be a newbie?”

He shrugs. “It’s intuitive.”

“It’s a bunch of different colored ropes in a pile. What am I not picking up on?”

“Dunno. Maybe it’s just all the rock climbing I’ve done.”

“That would make sense.” I wonder if Blake rock climbed with him. Probably. That’s probably why he wanted to marry her. Me, he married by complete mistake.

His hands pull at the front of my harness, making sure it’s snug against my breasts. "You sure you want to do this?”

"I'm not going to let a little thing like mortal terror stop me," I say, attempting bravado.

The truth is, I don't want to look weak in front of him. And he brought up Blake as a comparison. I feel awkward when we are measured with the same stick. How can I not be in competition with the woman he was supposed to marry?

The harness cinches me in like a wasp's thorax. It’s definitely not made for comfort. But I have to admit, my butt looks pretty fabulous. I catch Jay sneaking a glance at my ass. I give him a mock glare. He just grins and shrugs.

"Ready?" he asks.

No. Not even a little. But I nod, because some batshit part of me is actually looking forward to this.

“As ready as I’ll get.”

The trees swallow us as we ascend, their leafy canopies creating a dappled green tunnel. My legs are already trembling as we rise. As we tackle the first obstacle, Jay moves with the grace of a panther. His balance is impeccable, thanks, I assume, to his power yoga and morning runs. I, on the other hand, am a teetering stack of dishes, ready to crash at any moment.

He catches me as I stumble for the fifth time. While I like having his hands on my body, I actually loathe how terrible I am at this. Why did I think this was a good idea again?

"Just take it slow. You'll get the hang of it." His voice is annoyingly calm and makes me feel like punching him.

I shoot him a look that could curdle milk. "Easy for you to say, Mr. Fitness. You actually look hotter when you’re doing something physically demanding."

He gives a surprised laugh. "Calla, you need to forget about how you look. Ropes courses don’t flatter anyone. Just focus on having fun."

I want to argue, to tell him that looking ridiculous is the least of my concerns. But he's right. I need to remove my main fear: the fear of falling.

So I take a deep breath, close my eyes, lean my head back, and step backwards, knowing I will tumble down.

The fall is immediate and terrifying. I plunge into avoid that yanks a scream from my lungs. Then the safety harness catches me, yanking my whole body to stop me from falling. I swing like a pendulum. My heartbeat slams against my ribcage.

After a second, I open my eyes to see Jay letting go as well. His body arcs through the air with the abandon of a kid on a playground. He whoops. I can't help but giggle.

“I just wanted to see how it felt to fall,” I say, raising my hands in a shrug. “Not terrible.”

“You did that on purpose?” Jay looks at me and I think I catch admiration in his eyes. “That’s smart.”

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