Page 19 of Rathgar

I raise my hand to knock on the door and it opens before I can do so, a beaming Lara standing there to greet me.

What a sight for sore eyes. I fall into her embrace and she welcomes me home. She doesn’t ask what’s going on with Rathgar, and for that I’m grateful. I was afraid she, or more likely Soren, would judge me for returning so soon. Would treat it as a rejection of my duties.

As if on cue, my stomach cramps again and my head spins. These cramps are coming on more frequently, but I tell myself it’s just hunger. I was so stressed today I don’t think I’ve eaten.

“Why don’t we get you inside,” Lara says, letting me lean on her. “There’s someone who’s very excited to see you.”

The moment I’m in the door, there she is. Iris rounds the corner, toddling as fast as her little legs will take her. “Mommy!” She cries, holding her hands out to greet me.

All pain, all soreness or uncertainty, melts away the moment I see her face. She’s what I do all this for. I pick her up, letting her small arms wrap around my neck. I’ve only been gone for a little over two weeks, and yet how does it seem like she’s grown even in that time? I boost her on my hip and give her a kiss on the forehead.

“Hey there, baby girl. Did you miss me?”

“Miss…mama!” And she buries her face in my chest.

While I have her in my arms, things don’t seem so bad. For a moment, I can almost pretend that I’m not almost-certainly knocked up by a grumpy alien warrior. I can pretend that things are normal. That life is normal.

Tears come to my eyes at last, and I sniff them away for a few seconds before letting them fall. It’s just the hormones, I tell myself. It’s just that I’m happy to be home with my family again. Not that I’m worried about Rathgar or the pregnancy or anything like that.

Certainly not.

“Janie!” Soren steps into the room after hearing our voices. “Didn’t expect to see you here so soon. Is everything all right?”

“I…yes, I think so.” The reality? I had no idea. Rathgar had up and vanished without a trace, and no one was telling me anything. Orvox forgot about one thing during our call, however. Rathgar’s commander just so happens to be my brother-in-law.

If anyone knows where he’s gone, it’s him.

“Good,” Soren continues. “I received a message from Rathgar earlier, by the way.”

My eyes widen; my stomach cramps again. Here it was. The moment of truth. “Is he…all right?”

“It’s my fault, really.” Soren runs a hand through his hair and shakes his head. “I tried to talk him out of it, if you can believe me.”

This didn’t sound good. I sit down heavily on the couch and hold Iris close, waiting for the news. Any minute now, Soren’s going to tell me that something’s happened to Rathgar. That he’s hurt. That he’s not coming back.

That — heaven forbid — he’s been killed.

“He didn’t want you to worry, first and foremost.” Soren points out. “He’s alive and well, but he is leading a raid to a nearby tribe. Tensions have been…” he frowns, “shall we say, strained lately. And they’re showing their hand, meaning that we needed to make a move. I was going to go, but he told me it was important to him. Something personal, he said.” He sighed. “He’s a formidable warrior. One of the best. But to think he’d leave his omega alone in a time like this…” He shakes his head. “That man has more muscles than sense sometimes.”

I can’t help but chuckle, because while funny, it’s also true. Rathgar is a lot of things, but calm and methodical isn’t one of them. He takes action first and cleans up the fallout later.

In life, work, and in bed, I think to myself.

My mind aches with the realization. Of course, I knew that as Aesirheim’s most prized warriors, they would be called to duty if the need arose. I guess I just…assumed that was all in the past.

Silly me. Peace and freedom always come at a cost.

“Do you know when he’ll be back?” That’s the first question on my mind, but it’s far from the last. It’s also the most innocent one I can think of right now.

“I don’t know at the moment, but he’s to keep me informed. I’ll let you know if anything changes.” He says it so easily, so casually, as if it were no more than a statement of fact. Maybe for him it is nothing more than a mission briefing, but for me, it’s different.

Because it’s not just my mind aching with this new revelation. My heart worries for him as well.

I tell myself it’s just normal human compassion. I tell myself all kinds of things, but it’s getting ever harder to believe them.

I can’t be falling for Rathgar. I can’t. It would ruin everything Lara and I have worked for and sacrificed so much for.

“There’s one more thing.” Soren catches my attention and pulls me away from my troubled thoughts. “He’s offered up his home in the meantime. He asks that you stay there until he returns and that his personal house servants will prepare anything you desire.”

---