Page 27 of Derek

She finished the pizza right before the last dance of the movie. Was it was worth the effort to get up and go to bed or was crashing on the couch a viable option? Then she remembered how she’d felt the last time she’d spent the night there and got up before she let her exhaustion change her mind. Sonja gave Snuggles his nightly medicine, brushed her teeth, and was aboutto turn out the light when she remembered that Derek had asked her to text him again at bedtime.

She sent him a quick message about her day’s cleaning and made sure her alarm was set. Snuggles was in his usual spot on the pillow next to her, and she was ready for sleep once she turned off her bedside lamp. Unfortunately, sleep wasn’t ready for her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like the entire night, Sonja woke to an empty bed. Snuggles didn’t like sharing with a human who wouldn’t stay still.

Sonja opened her curtains to find dark skies and steady rain, which matched her mood all too well. Today was the day of the biopsy, and she wanted to hide under the covers rather than get up. Nevertheless, she made it to work then operated on autopilot with the mantra ‘just get me through this’ playing in her head at work and on her way to the hospital. She didn’t have to wait at all, and before she knew it, she was on her way out with a miniature ice pack in her bra to keep the area where the needle had gone in numb once the anesthetic wore off. She had a bowl of minestrone from the café for dinner and had another early night. Now, all she had to do was wait for the results. Easier said than done.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Wednesday afternoon finally arrived after two long days at the café, and Sonja knew she’d driven everyone but Suzie crazy. Normally, as long as people did their jobs, she kept a laid-back approach to managing. This week was different.

Tuesday, she’d hovered in the kitchen so much the chef had finally threatened to quit if she didn’t stop meddling. Wednesday, she couldn’t stop moving—checking tables for cleanliness, shadowing the servers, rushing the busboys, nitpicking every little thing. The need to stay busy, to keep her hands occupied, had become unbearable.

She told herself she was just making sure everything ran smoothly. She wasn’t fooling anyone.

By the time the last customer walked out, a noticeable tension lifted in the air. Employees packed up in record time, throwing her wary glances as they left. She could feel their relief, even if no one said it outright.

Once the door shut behind the last one, Suzie turned to her, arms crossed. “Would you care to explain your behavior over the last two days?”

Sonja sighed, running a hand down her face. The exhaustion that had been masked by constant motion settled into her bones.“I’m sorry, Suzie. I’m stressed, and I’m taking it out on everyone else. I promise I’ll be better tomorrow.”

“It’s not something with you and Derek, is it? You guys seemed great together at the club.”

“No, it’s not Derek. Things with him are great. He told me he loved me Friday night.” Warmth spread through her, filling every inch of her body like sunlight breaking through clouds. Her heart kicked up a beat, and the memory replayed in her mind, just as vivid as when it happened.

“That’s fantastic!” Suzie hugged her. “So, what’s going on? This is not ‘he told me he loves me’ behavior.”

“It’s probably nothing. I’ve got a doctor’s appointment later to go over some test results. I’m just edgy. Don’t worry.”

“Okay, but you’d tell me if there was something wrong, wouldn’t you?”

“Of course I would,” Sonja said as she mentally crossed her fingers for stretching the truth. “I’m just worried over nothing. Now, don’t you have to go watch Tim or Abby do something spectacular in soccer?”

“Damn, you’re right, and if I don’t leave right now, I’ll be late. I expect a full report tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am. Go!” She shooed a distracted Suzie from the office.

An hour and a half later, she was sitting in the waiting area at Dr. Davidson’s office. She checked her watch. The appointment had been for 4:30 pm, and it was almost five. The waiting room was practically empty when a woman appeared at the door. “Sonja Madden?” she asked.

Sonja got up immediately. “That’s me.”

“Hi, I’m Erin Carlier. I’m a nurse practitioner,” she said as she led Sonja to an exam room. “Do you prefer Ms. Madden or Sonja?”

“Sonja, please.” They came to an empty room and went in. Sonja sat in the patient’s chair while Erin took the ubiquitous rolling chair that all doctors’ offices seemed to have.

“I’m so sorry to keep you waiting. It’s been a zoo this afternoon. One of the doctors called in sick this morning, and Dr. Davidson had to leave at lunchtime for a personal emergency. We rescheduled most of their patients, but we’ve still had more to cope with than usual. She asked me specifically not to put you off, given why you’re here.”

“I hope it’s nothing serious. Dr. Davidson’s emergency, I mean.”

Yeah, yeah, she knew she had bigger things to worry about, but fussing over everyone else was easier than sitting with her own fears.

“I don’t know any details. Sorry,” Erin said. “For you, though, it’s good news. The biopsy results are negative. No sign of malignancy.”

“Oh, my God. That’s wonderful! So, what was it?”

“The pathologist said, and I quote, ‘No signs of ductal or lobular carcinoma. Possible beginnings of fibrocystic formation.’”

“What does that mean? Fibrocystic formation.” Sonja wanted to be sure she understood everything. “My mother died from lobular carcinoma, and my grandmother from ductal, but I’ve never heard of fibrocystic.”

“Basically, fibrocystic breast disease means a tendency to develop fibroid cysts in your breast tissue. The only trouble they cause for most women is mild discomfort, lumpy breasts, and false positives on mammograms.” Erin chuckled a little. “I know it’s not funny, but those are the only problems I’ve ever heard of with cysts in the breast.”

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