Page 7 of Who Pissed Off Ivy Dell?

“I can honestly say no one described you that way.”

She laughs harder at this. “Well, good. Then I won’t disappoint.”

Josephine’s car slows so we can step out of the road and let her pass. She waves at me through the windshield, but she doesn’t stop, doesn’t even roll down her window.

“Figures you’d be friends with her.”

“What does that mean?”

“Aren’t you friends?”

“Sure, I’d say we’re friends.”

“Well, there you go. It was nice to meet you, Ivy. Come on, Wizard.”

The cat follows her. Very doglike. I think I’ll buy him a toy to replace the destroyed one he left on my doorstep.

I knock on Josephine’s door. April may not have wanted to explain their beef, but I need to know.

“So, I see you’ve met April.”

“I met Wizard first. And then she appeared out of nowhere, asking how I knew her cat.”

“Owning that cat is her most redeeming quality.”

“What’s the deal between y’all?”

“She thinks she had something going with Cujo and I messed it up for her.”

“What does Cujo say?”

“He says everybody makes mistakes, and she was one of his.”

“Ouch. I hope nobody calls me a mistake.”

“They wouldn’t. He’s nice to her, just not nice in the way she wants him to be, and that pisses her off, so she blames me.”

“Were they a couple or just—”

“More like a couple of times.”

“Oh. What’s weird is that she doesn’t seem like the clingy type. More like she’d push everybody away.”

“Yeah, well, she wants to cling to Cujo.”

“He definitely doesn’t seem like he’d be into a stage five clinger.”

“Not at all.”

“That’s why he’s into you. Your independence.”

“How do you know it’s not my excellent blowjob skills?”

“I’m sure that doesn’t hurt. But the free tattoos are probably the real draw.”

“I haven’t tattooed him.”

“Why not?”

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