Page 3 of Riding Jamie

“Brunch sounds perfect,” she says, her eyes bright with excitement.

After we finish our coffee, I head upstairs to shower and slick my lips with gloss. We bundle into her sleek little convertible and sing along to the radio, enjoying the gentle breeze of the late September air. Aunt Kathy knows the owner of the cute little bistro on the East side, and she talks me into ordering something unreasonably expensive off the menu and lets me sip her mimosa when the waiter isn’t looking. It’s a cute spot, and even though we’re sitting out on the patio, the traffic noise isn’t so loud that we have to shout at each other to be heard.

“So,” I ask, arching a brow at my aunt as she finishes telling me about her decoration plans for the party, “who’s even going to be there? Sounds like you’re setting up for quite the party.”

She’s already halfway through her second mimosa, and her movements are starting to get looser, the buzz of champagne making her giggly and playful. The table we’re sitting at has a bunch of little sketches engraved roughly into the wood, worn soft over time, and I trace my fingers over a few of them as she picks at the yogurt bowl she ordered.

“Oh, it’s nothing too crazy, pinky promise,” she says, grinning widely. “I’m inviting a few friends of mine. Some of Ricky’s coworkers have said they’ll stop by.”

So there'll probably be at least fifty people, knowing her. Aunt Kathy is known for many things, but casual get-togethers are not one of those things. She loves extravagant parties and expensive alcohol, and she takes every excuse she can find to set up a party. Regardless, she’s never short of party guests to fill the penthouse with.

“You’ve already met some of them,” she barrels on as she refills her mimosa from the pitcher on the table. “You remember Shannan, the golfer? He’s in town, so I’m sure he’ll make an appearance.”

She’s excited and a little bit past buzzed, and although I roll my eyes at the way she chatters along and gestures a littleexcessively with her hands, it’s infectious. I find myself giggling even as I reach out to pull the mimosa from her hand before she can accidentally dump it on the concrete. She pouts at me playfully, but allows me to return it safely to a solid surface.

“And it’ll be good for you to meet the rest of Ricky’s team. I know they were out of the office last time you stopped by,” she says as she slips a straw into her glass. “Are you excited to start your internship?”

I take a sip of my drink to give myself a moment to think before I answer. I’m still nervous about everything, no matter how serious I am about making the best of it. It’s a lot of change all at once, and I’m used to life moving at a much slower pace.

“Yeah,” I answer, my voice a little shaky. “Next week!”

She smiles at me softly over the rim of her mimosa, her eyes warm.

“You’ve got nothing to be nervous about,” she tells me. “I know it’s a lot, but you’re going to do great.”

“I hope so,” I agree quietly.

I suddenly find it hard to meet her eyes, my gaze falling back to the waffles on my plate as I stab my fork through another bite and bring it up to my lips. What if I’m awful at it? What if I let everyone down and don’t have anything to fall back on? What if my plans don’t work out and I have absolutely no idea where to turn? What if I have to go back home and face everyone? Face him?

“How’ve you been holding up, Oakie?” she asks gently, breaking me out of my thoughts.

I smile at the nickname, the easy affection taking my mind off my mounting panic, even if only for a few moments.

“It’s been hard,” I answer honestly, shrugging as I push my waffles around my plate. “It’s a lot of change, a lot that I’m not used to. I’m kind of keeping myself sane by running right now. I’m sure you’ve noticed.”

Aunt Kathy’s eyes sparkle as she laughs, and she tips her head back with an affectionate sigh.

“I’m glad someone gets use out of that gym,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Your uncle was so insistent that we get it built, and he still goes to the gym he met his trainer at.”

I chuckle along with her, taking a sip of my tea to keep myself from sighing. I’m not lying when I say that running is all that’s keeping me sane, but I don’t want my aunt to see just how rough around the edges I am right now. I don’t want her to worry any more than I’m sure she already does, and, well, I am keeping myself sane.

“That definitely sounds like him,” I say with a forced laugh. “I’m really glad it’s there, honestly. I’m trying to get used to everything out here, so it’s nice to have something familiar to keep me a little more grounded.”

“Look at you,” she sighs fondly. “All grown up.”

I look up, seeing the way her face is torn between pride and worry, and I realize that I’ve let my happy mood slip quite a bit. I do my best to shake my growing bad mood off and take another sip of my tea, smiling widely.

“I’m really excited about the internship.” Excited, nervous, terrified. “I’m going to work my ass off.”

My words seem to have the opposite effect I intended them to, and I wince when I see the shadow of concern flicker in my aunt’s eyes.

“Just remember not to push yourself too hard while you’re at it, alright?” she asks.

“Promise,” I say, keeping my voice bright and happy as I take another bite of my waffles.

Hesitant silence falls between the two of us, and I glance around the patio, taking in the cute little string lights and the water bowls for people’s dogs tucked by one of the walls. Can I imagine myself here, in five years, bringing mypurebred Chihuahua named Coco to lunch as if they’re my only companion? I’m trying to distract myself, but I know all I’m really doing is waiting impatiently for my aunt to break the quiet. She has never been the quiet type, and usually when she’s not chattering, it’s because she has something important to say.

I just don’t know if I can handle important right now.

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