Page 50 of Face Me Off

“You didn’t do anything. You were a newborn baby.”

Ryan used this same argument back in high school. He would tell me over and over that it wasn’t my fault, that I had no control over what happened inside Mom’s womb. But knowing something and feeling it are two different things.

“My father makes me feel worthless—lesser because I’m a female.” His constant reminder that he lost the chance of having a son hangs over me like a guillotine blade. I’ve spent my entire life trying to make up for something out of my control to avoid getting cut down.

“And that’s not okay. You’re not worthless.” Ryan grabs my hand again and looks me straight on. He’s never looked so serious. “You need to quit trying to please that man.”

I blink back the moisture threatening to spill. “I know.”

“Do you? Because you shouldn’t have to prove your worth to anyone, Maddy, especially not your father.”

Tears blur my vision as our gazes lock. Those eyes hold a fierce determination as if he’s silently promising to fight any battle for me. A lump forms in my throat. His words might be genuine, but they don’t erase the years of feeling inadequate, of feeling like I was never enough. It’s hard to believe him when I’ve been conditioned to think otherwise my whole life.

“I hear you, but?—”

“No buts,” he interrupts firmly. “You’re strong, Maddy. Stronger than you know. And you’re talented, so damn talented.”

My heart flutters at his words but also aches. Ryan sees me—the real me—and it’s both a comfort and a curse. Comfort because it feels nice to be seen, and a curse because it makes it harder for me to keep from falling deeper. What we have may befun, and I like him more than I’m willing to admit, but there isn’t a future with Ryan Sorenson. That’s my unfortunate reality.

Despite everything, I give his hand a reassuring squeeze. “I did do something for myself. I entered an art contest with a local gallery.”

“Really? That’s great.”

“The cash prize is small, but the reward is having my work displayed in the gallery as a solo show.” Excitement bubbles inside despite knowing nothing will come of it. “It’s a long shot, but if I win … it could be the start of something.”

“That’s amazing, Maddy! Do you have the artwork already made?”

“I’ve created some sketches, but I’m still trying to come up with a theme. I need that centralized piece that pops. The idea hasn’t quite come to me yet.”

“No doubt it will. I have faith in you.” His lips curve into that heart-stopping grin of his, and I genuinely believe him. It’s hard not to when he looks at me with that bright, hopeful expression.

But then reality crashes back upon me, causing me to frown.

“What’s that look for?”

“My dad found out about me entering, and…”

“And what?” he prompts.

“Told me not to pursue it. Dad wants me to focus on school. He also reminded me of the slip in my GPA last semester.”

“Your grades are excellent.” The alarm in Ryan’s voice makes me smile, albeit sadly.

I shrug. “I know. But Dad wants perfection. I stayed at Becky’s house the night of her party because we’d had a huge argument. They never take my art seriously.”

Ryan works his jaw as silence stretches between us. After a few beats, he says, “It seems we both sacrificed our goals.”

My chest constricts. He’s exactly right. We both yearn for things out of our reach. We’ve both sidelined dreams for the sakeof practicality and obligations. It’s comforting to know someone understands this internal struggle but also heartbreaking. We both deserve better; we deserve to chase our dreams without guilt or obligations holding us back.

My phone interrupts before I can respond. I flash the screen to Ryan—Dad.

Ryan withdraws his hand from mine as I answer.

“Hello.”

“I don’t care what you’re doing. Get to my office now!”

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN