Page 74 of Embracing Love

“Come on in,” he beckoned and stood aside to let her pass.

“How have you been?” he asked, the eagerness in his voice telling.

“Busy, like you.” She seemed stilted, her voice controlled. It wasn’t the Tanya who had come to his hotel room that night. “My list of things in the office piled up while I was away.”

“I know, I have the same problem.” He gave her a careful look, and tried not to let his gaze fall to her lips. Everything and anything reminded him of that night, a night he thought about every single day.

“I’m afraid we can’t move forward until this whole legal problem is resolved. I don’t even think we ought to be talking, Tanya. I’ve been told not to have any dealings with Spiral for the same reason.”

She looked startled. “I understand. I wasn’t sure when you’d be back. I was passing through and I thought I’d touch base with you and see if there was any more information you might have on the matter.”

“Sorry. I can’t say anything. Spiral cited your company in their lawsuit as being the ones who took the business that should have been theirs.”

“I know. I understand.” She said, and she seemed as disappointed as he felt.

He tried moving the topic to something safer. “I only just got back from London a few days ago but I’ve been busy with the lawyers. I was going to call you tonight, or tomorrow, in fact.”

“Nadine mentioned you’d gone to London.”

He scratched his jawline, ran a heavy hand over his stubble. “I needed to visit my son before he moved to Australia.”

The set expression on her face softened a little. “I’m really happy for you, Gabriel.”

She seemed to lose the formality, and he felt a little more relaxed. “Thank you.”

“Your family means a lot to you. I can see that.”

“My son means a lot to me.” He wanted her to understand that there was nothing between the mother of his child and him any longer.

He wanted to tell her he’d needed clarity, that he’d needed to know he could let his son go without it meaning that he was losing him forever. He wanted to tell her that nothing much had fazed him after that visit and that he had learned not to be so fearful about love. That it would always be there between father and son.

There would be distance. But it was only distance.

Love could and would still survive.

But he wasn’t sure how to explain this to her, because he wasn’t so sure he understood it all himself, just yet.

He wasn’t really sure he could jump back into the closeness they’d shared that night, where they had started to open up to one another. And he knew this wasn’t the time for that conversation.

It would have to wait.

She wore her impenetrable expression again, the one where he was unable to comprehend what was going on with her. He felt he couldn’t ask her either, because she seemed closed off to him.

And now the legal problems stood in the way of them getting any closer. He wouldn’t forgive himself if he dragged Tanya’s name into it all. She would be mortified. For that reason alone, he would need to back off.

“I’m happy for you, Gabriel. It’s important to get closure.”

“It is important,” he agreed, holding her gaze, wanting to dig deeper, needing to know she was over her ex, and had moved on, too.

But how could he ask when they couldn’t move on yet?

“Otherwise you’re stuck, in limbo, not knowing whether you can move forward, and so you live in the past.”

“You speak as though you know from experience, Tanya.”

“I’m learning.” She looked at him, then looked away, and he waited for her to reveal some more of herself. “I was just passing through,” she said, her voice low as she got up. “I’d better go.”

He got up as well. “Look, Tanya. Things are particularly awkward right now. It might be better if we didn’t keep in touch until the legal issues are cleared up.” As much as it killed him to say this to her, he felt it was the honorable thing to do.

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