Page 28 of An Indecent Longing

“Sweetheart, you don’t know what you’re saying.”

Get the fuck out of here.

Fuck that. He didn’t want to.

“I know exactly what I’m saying. I may be dreaming but I know what I want. I’ve always wanted you, from the minute I saw you. And I thought you wanted me, too. I don’t understand what happened.”

He wanted to tell her, wanted to lay it all out for her so she’d know why he couldn’t want her. Wanted to tell her why he needed to hate her and why what she’d done was so awful.

But he couldn’t do it. Because his sins weren’t any less than hers.

“I know you don’t. And I’m not going to lay them out now. Maybe one day—”

With a harsh sigh, she pushed away from him, rolling onto her other side so she faced away from him.

“This dream sucks. Just like real life. Wonder what that says about my crappy life.”

God damn it. Every word out of her mouth drove the stiletto she’d stuck in his heart just a little deeper.

And then he heard her sniffle.

Jesus fucking Christ.

What the fuck did he do now?

Lying down beside her, he wrapped his arms around her and dragged her close again. Which just seemed to make her cry even harder. But she cried without making a sound and that made him feel even worse than if she’d sobbed at loud decibels.

“Don’t cry, sweetheart. Don’t fucking cry. I can’t fucking stand it.”

She sniffed. “You can’t fucking stand me, can you? No, you can’t. I just don’t know what I did to make you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you, Dorrie. I can’t hate you.”

Her crying jag ended with a hiccup. “I really wish that were true.”

And he really wished he could tell her when she wasn’t drunk and half asleep. Or when his desire for her wasn’t riding him like a freight train barreling down the track.

Hell, she probably wouldn’t even remember her dream tomorrow morning.

And he’d want her to remember. Would want her to remember every kiss, every breath, every touch, every time he stroked inside her and every orgasm he gave her.

He wanted there to be multiples.

Probably should stop thinking about sex if you want to get out of here without breaking any laws.

But he couldn’t make himself get up and leave her alone in the dark.

So he hoped like hell that she wouldn’t remember any of this in the morning and pulled her back into the cradle of his body and held her until the room filled with light.

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