Page 23 of A Game Of Love

My eyes dart down to Bishop’s, and he gives me a soft smile. “Go.”

“Are you sure?” I ask, not bothering to look at anyone else in the room.

“I’m sure.”

Nodding, I lean down, press a quick kiss to his forehead and take off to go check on Toby.

I know he said he was going to accept Bishop and me being together, but that doesn’t mean I should be acting like this in front of him.

I’m not going to hide what I have with Bishop from anyone anymore, but I need to be more considerate about Toby’s feelings, right? At least for right now. He just found out about us last night.

And here I am, the next day, telling our family I’m dating his best friend.

Something tells me none of this is going to get any less complicated or weird anytime soon.

I hope that's not the case. I really do.

Tobias

I thought I could do it, but I can’t. I just fucking can’t.

I’ve never in my life wanted to kill my best friend more than I did just now. Watching them together, like a happy little couple, kissing in front of me as they proudly tell the whole fucking family they’re dating, had me wanting to climb over that table and wrap my hands around his fucking neck.

She’s mine! My fucking girl. I don’t want to share her. I don’t want to watch her love another man, to have someone else's hands on her.

Slamming my bedroom door shut, I start to pace around my room. I can feel the anger start to boil inside me.

I’m doing my best to take deep breaths, to not let my anger get the better of me, but it’s not fucking helping. White hot rage is all I can feel, red is all I see.

My hands clench and unclench at my side as I start to breathe deeply.

Don’t do this, Toby. Don’t react like you want to. If you do, you risk losing her, and that would hurt so much more than having to share her.

It’s easier said than done, though. Because no matter how much I tell myself to relax, it does fuck all.

For the first time in a week, I feel like I’m not in control of my body. I fucking hate it. My meds have started to kick in, but they haven’t taken the full effect. Between taking my meds and talking to my therapist on the phone, I’ve been pretty good about stabilizing my moods.

And I really thought I was fine after I didn’t react the way everyone thought I would last night when I found the two of them together.

But I guess I was just too shocked and numb to really feel the full effects of what's going on until now.

Lilly is with my best friend. The best friend who’s known how much I’ve been in love with Lilly since we were kids. The best friend I trusted with my girl, only for him to worm his way into her heart too.

Now... I have to fucking share her. She’s not mine anymore.

“Toby?”

Her soft, worried voice has me pausing. Wild eyes snap over to see her standing in my doorway.

She doesn’t ask, walking in like she has for years.

Closing the door behind her, she leans against it and watches me, assessing me. She’s trying to take stock of this situation, see if I’m going to lose it. But she doesn’t look scared, just worried.

That has my shoulders slumping. I don’t want her to be afraid of me. To see a monster when she looks at me, especially if all she sees is me reacting badly to every situation.

“I’m sorry.” I close my eyes, scrubbing my hands over my face.

“You're upset,” she says it as a fact.

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