Page 36 of Lock Me Out

LENI

No!

A hand clamps over my mouth and my nose. A hand holding a rag that smells funny, and it makes me twist my head from side to side to get away from the smell, but I can’t do it. He’s too strong, the hand is too strong. I can’t hold my breath long enough.

I need to breathe!

But I can’t, because I can’t breathe in whatever is on the rag, only it’s already too late. I’m already inhaling; that’s what my burning lungs demand. I need to inhale. I need to…

My eyes snap open all at once. There’s no slow wake up. I’m wide awake, fully aware, and about to throw up.

I can’t move—my body is frozen in fear, muscles locked, my lungs unable to pull in enough oxygen after a nightmare that was really a memory playing itself out in my overwrought subconscious. The memory of being taken off the street while Deborah laughed coldly, and Dennis drugged me.

I’m glad she’s dead. It’s a horrible thought, but it’s true. She can’t hurt me anymore, neither of them can. I’m safe here, sandwiched between two warm, solid bodies. They rescued me together; they brought me back here. Nobody is going to hurt me.

If anyone had tried to tell me a year ago that Colt and Nix Alistair would be my salvation, I would’ve told them to have their head examined.

That’s the truth of my life now. They’ve gone from my worst nightmare to my protectors. I’m pretty sure I would be dead now if it wasn’t for them.

But Mom is dead because of Nix.

No. I don’t want to think about that. Not when I’m warm and uncomfortable. All I want is to curl up between them and sleep. To let go of everything for a little while, to trust that they’ll take care of whatever comes up.

But is that childish? Probably. After everything I’ve been through, who could blame me for wanting to finally put down my burdens or at least hand them to somebody else to take care of for a while?

I’m facing Nix, who is still on his back, with my back to Colt. I can only see the left side of Nix’s face, his perfect, unmarked profile, reminding me of the cold, haughty boy I first met. He’s a different person now in so many ways, but like this, I can pretend he was untouched by the fire.

Colt stirs behind me, and the pressure against my ass tells me he’s sporting the same morning wood that’s tenting the comforter over Nix’s crotch. “You okay?” The whisper in my earis soft and loving and protective. It goes nicely with the arm he drapes around me, holding me tight against his bare chest.

“Better now,” I whisper. “Just had a nightmare.”

“You’re safe.” With his lips against my ear, he whispers, “Here with us. Nothing’s going to hurt you.”

Life changes so fast. I can’t believe I actually crave Colt’s nearness now. I can’t help but wiggle against him a little, tucking myself closer to his body.

“Careful,” he warns, and there’s a growl running under his words. “Don’t make any moves you can’t back up with action.” Like he’s trying to prove a point, he moves his hips, thrusting his erect dick against me, and heat bursts to life in my core. My nipples tighten when his hand brushes over my chest. I close my eyes, hungry for escape. He can give that to me.

But Nix is right here, too, and I guess the movement wakes him up because his eyes open, and he turns his head, blinking hard like he’s confused.

The confusion doesn’t last long. He doesn’t have to say a word—I can see it in his eyes, in the needy light that fills them. That hungry gaze travels over my body, watching as Colt fondles my boobs.

We’ve been here before, haven’t we? Except we haven’t. It’s different now. It’s just the three of us in this bed. Nobody else watching, nobody calling the shots.

Closing my eyes again doesn’t take me any further away from the ugly memories that are never far from my mind. I don’t want to go back to that place. I can’t. This is my life. James isn’t in control anymore.

“Are you enjoying that?” Nix asks before I open my eyes again, ready to fully experience what’s about to happen without fear, without the past holding me back. The two of them exchange a look—neither says a word, and I don’t think they have to. They understand each other.

Which is probably why Colt doesn’t stop Nix from taking my hand and guiding it under the blanket, where his erection awaits. I could stop him if I wanted to.

I don’t want to. For some reason, closing my fingers around his thick shaft takes the heat that was already building and turns it into an inferno.

His helpless groans when I start to pump my fist up and down his length are nothing compared to Colt’s grunts in my ear while he humps me from behind. “What do you think?” he whispers while his hands grope and caress. His hot breath fans across my skin when he asks, “You think you can take us both?”

Do I? Throbbing and aching and already so wet, I want to try. Maybe one day I’ll figure out what it is about them that unlocks this deep, dark need in my soul.

Right now, all I want to do is give into it.

“Why don’t you use your mouth instead of your hand?” Colt suggests, wedging a hand between my legs, toying with my swollen lips until I spread my thighs so he can touch more of me. “Let me watch you suck him off while I fuck you. Does that sound good?”

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