Page 32 of Tied

Chris

At first I felt out of place. These people are a very tight knit group. Their inside jokes have inside inside jokes. And the troubles these people have gone through. If I thought my past was dark, twisted and convoluted, it has nothing on them.

I saw what Manhattan went through, and as a country what we went through during 9/11. These people have memories that will stay with them forever from those days, but they’ve come out stronger. And they love each other greatly. Also, they’ve been very accepting of a stranger in their midst. I don’t feel left out, or a third wheel.

But then there’s Tyler.

What to say about that? He wanted nothing to do with me, hiding in conversations as far from my side of the table as possible. I might as well have been a Leper. He’d give more attention to a scary clown or a naked woman. But things have changed in the past hour. He’s talked to me, invested in the conversations I’ve been having with Jim and Troy. I’m slightly confused at the turnabout.

As he rises from the other side, he approaches me directly, tapping me on the shoulder. “Mind if I sit?”

“By all means.” I wave my hand to indicate the empty chair that Jim vacated a short while ago. He ran off to yell at someone in the kitchen, something about my Benny not having enough sauce.

“I’m sorry I left you the other night.”

“Nothing to say sorry about, Tyler. You couldn’t have known that was going to happen.”

“No,” he states emphatically. “We didn’t come as a couple, but I shouldn’t have left you alone without checking that you were okay.”

He’s truly thinking this is his fault?

Shit.

“There’s no shame or blame for anyone but that jackass and me. You didn’t introduce us. You didn’t say ‘take him home’, nor did you make me get into that situation. So, sorry, but I won’t accept the apology.”

As he’s about to open his mouth to take the blame further, I touch his hand and pull on his chin to show him how serious I am. “It’s not your fault, atall.”

The feel of his soft hand under mine, the rough stubble of his early afternoon scruff, and the light in his eyes as I show how serious I am is intoxicating. But he’s shown me quite often how he’s not interested in me that way so I shut that wish down and concentrate on him and I becoming friends.

Pulling my hands back and placing them on my lap, I smile. “So what’s the story with those two?” I look at Tessa and Tig.

“Them? They’ve known Jax since he moved to the city. He used to be a shy, awkward boy from Tuscaloosa. He rented a room in their condo and the rest is history. Troy, in his infinite flamboyant way, dragged the real Jax out of the closet.” Quieting for a moment, he laughs. “Actually, I think Jax pulled him from the closet.”

“And what about you?” I ask.

“Me? Oh, I was secure in myself long before I met this group. My parents are very supportive,” he informs me. He says it so nonchalantly, it surprises me.

“Really?”

Leaning back in the chair, he crosses his legs. “Yeah, they’re very open people. My father and his husband, my mother and her wife.”

“That’s…” Trying to think of the right thing to say, Tyler interjects before I can.

“Hard to understand, I know. Most don’t get that same support. I’m sure you didn’t.”

Fuck no. “Nail on the head.”

“Yeah, figured.” Touching my hand, he turns my arm so he can see the tattoo on my bicep and asks me in a serious way, “Did you serve?”

“Yeah. Marine Corp.” I gently remove my arm from his hand. “Semper Fi all the way. Some things I wish I could forget. Others...I wish I’d never done.”

Pulling my arm back towards him, he holds my hand firmly and strokes the back of it, brushing his fingers across the old scars. “We all do things we wish we could forget. Sometimes we wish to take it back.”

Somehow, I don’t think we’re talking about the same thing. I’m unsure of where this conversation is going. Honestly, I’m getting whiplash from Tyler. First it’s no way in hell he’d consider me attractive, then it’s staring longingly at me from across the club to hiding behind a friend when I arrived at brunch. Now he’s attentive and sweet.

“Tyler? I—”

“Wait, Chris. Let me say something first.” Quieting, I wait. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain from it.