Page 56 of Golden Rule

“Okay, noted,” he says, moving on without further question. “We’ll still do some testing because it’s not uncommon for a man’s fertility to be impacted by a variety of factors over time, so it’s worth taking a look.”

West nods, but doesn’t speak, and I imagine he’s still trying to shrug off the same uncomfortable thoughts that just overtook me, too.

“Blue, I see here that your former specialist recommended that you hold off eighteen to twenty-four months before giving IVF another try following your last treatment. Was that due to complications?”

I shake my head, sitting a little straighter in my seat. “N—no. It was because, when the last treatment failed, I… went to sort of a… dark place.”

It feels like all the air’s been sucked out of the room after admitting that, especially because all three of us seated here today can do math. Which means we’re all aware it hasn’t been anywhere near the recommended eighteen to twenty-four months.

“Things were different then, though.”

My rushed words have Dr. Tyler’s eyes lifting from the page. “In what way?”

“Well, last time, my husband and I were alone. We didn’t have a support system, and with how West has to travel during the season, I probably spent more time on my own than what was healthy. Which wasn’t his fault,” I add quickly, squeezingWest’s hand again. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that things are much different now, and… I’m ready.”

My chest heaves as I breathe harder, praying the past hasn’t just screwed me out of the chance to try again.

“I tell you what,” Dr. Tyler speaks up. “Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves. Why don’t we get started on your lab work and go from there? I’ll need a complete blood panel, and we’ll need to get you in for an ultrasound. Also, I’d like to get you scheduled for a hysteroscopy.”

I mean to keep my thoughts to myself, but when Dr. Tyler smiles and begins to explain, I can guess he saw the worry on my face.

“Take a breath,” he says. “The procedure is minimally invasive. It’s just that, with your history of multiple unsuccessful treatments, this would allow me to gather a bit more intel before creating a personalized plan. And while we’re working our way through those steps, I’ll reach out to your former doctor to gain a little more clarity on his notes.”

And just like that, my nerves that had begun to settle are unraveling again. Because I’m almost certain his investigation could lead him to the fact that I didn’t see a therapist like I’d been asked to do.

Forcing a smile, I nod. “Sounds good.”

“Perfect. Then, let’s get you down to the lab today and get the process moving along. Some of the tests can only be done on an empty stomach, so?—”

“Yes, the nurse informed me that we might be getting started today, so I haven’t eaten. Not since last night,” I add nervously, reminding myself to breathe.

Dr. Tyler’s smile grows. “Awesome, you’re on top of things. Patients like you always make the job easier,” he teases. “I’ll step out and have the nurse get your lab order ready, then we’ll get you on the schedule for the ultrasound and hysteroscopy.”

“How soon?”

I’m aware of how anxious I sound, but Iamanxious—to know my test results, to get the process started, to know how his conversation with my last doctor will go.

“Most patients get through the pre-treatment phase within six to eight weeks.”

His answer excites and rattles me at the same time, which accounts for why my response is nothing more than a tensely spoken, “Great.”

Dr. Tyler stands, folding both hands in front of him as he clutches my file. “Any questions?”

West shakes his head, then glances toward me before meeting the doctor’s gaze again. “No, I think we’re all set.”

After that, we stand too, and Dr. Tyler extends his hand to shake ours. “Well, if you think of anything between now and your next appointment, anything at all, please don’t hesitate to give me a call. Otherwise, it’s been a pleasure meeting you two.”

“Likewise,” West says.

Dr. Tyler is halfway to the door when he pauses, meeting West’s gaze again. “Forgive me if this is unprofessional, but… the football fan in me won’t let me leave without saying it. I’ve been following your and your brothers’ careers since your days at NCU. You three are something special. Tom Wells was wise to bring you to Cypress Pointe.”

West smiles, nodding to acknowledge the compliment. “Thank you, Sir.”

“And I think I was holding my breath with everyone else, keeping my fingers crossed that you’d make a quick recovery after banging up your shoulder. So, it’s excellent to see you back, healthy, and stronger than ever.”

My gaze slips to West, expecting to see him basking in Dr. Tyler’s praise, but although he smiles again, it’s definitely forced this time.

“Thank you,” he repeats, and Dr. Tyler nods. It’s clear that being able to voice his admiration just made his morning.

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