Page 25 of Back On Ice

She crosses her arm and raises an eyebrow. “Spill. Now.”

So I do. The arguments, the tension, and that kiss…

“Was it good?” Her expression tells me she thinks she already knows the answer.

“I—was it… what?” I sputter. Of course I fucking enjoyed it. But I’ll be damned if I give that information up willingly. “What do you mean, was it good? It’s not like Itoldhim to kiss me, he just… grabbed me, and things got out of hand. Nothing else happened. I left after.”

She doesn’t need to know that one kiss was enough to get me so hot and bothered that I came in the shower with his name on my lips.

The skeptical look on her face says she already knows more than I’m saying out loud. “So you’re telling me that Carter Williams—your first love, high school sweetheart, and hottie hockey god—kissed you… and not just kissed you, but grabbed you and all but claimed your mouth with the burning, pent up passion of nine years of longing, and you didn’t enjoy it?”

Well, fuck, when she puts it like that…

Nuh uh.

No way.

Denial may be a river in Egypt, but I’m going to stay for as long as possible. “Nope.” I pop the “p” and stand up from my chair, crossing my arms to match her stance. “I would never enjoy anything with Carter. He had his chance, and he blew it.”

Abbie rolls her eyes at me. Her silence is unsettling, and I keep talking just to fill it, reminding myself why what I just said is true.

“I mean, the nerve of him! I tell him what’s bothering me, and he acts like he doesn’t even know what I’m talking about! Like hedidn’tleave me for Notre Dame without telling me, cheat on me, and then not even bother to show up for Sarah’s funeral. Tom needed him, and is somehow still friends with the guy afterit all, and acts like it’s no big deal. How can he think things can just… go back to the way they were?”

Abbie frowns, tapping her fingers on her arm like she’s thinking. “You’re right. You would think Tom would be just as upset that Carter didn’t come back to town after the accident… maybe things aren’t as they seem. Have you talked to Tom? I can’t help but think…” She sighs, shaking her head. “It was obvious how in love the two of you were. How happy. The love and adoration in his eyes when he would look at you was almost nauseating. I just don’t think he would have hurt you like that without a good reason.”

I hadn’t thought so either. “Yeah, well, he did,” I say bitterly.

“That's why I think something happened. Or changed, or… something.”

“Something changed alright…” I murmur, remembering vividly the way my heart was ripped out of my chest on the day of graduation.

“Oh my god, is that Carter? I thought he was still with Sophie.”

The words from the girl sitting in front of me have my heart pounding in my chest.

Just a moment ago, I had been close to tears, thinking about how utterly wrong it was that we were having a graduation ceremony without Carter. Sure, I’d hardly heard from him the last two months, and there had been complete silence the last two weeks, but he was so busy at Notre Dame and his dad was there, making sure he stayed focused.

Even though he’d graduated early, it was still Carter’s official graduation ceremony too. I had really thought he’d fly out here for it. We had always talked about finally graduating high school together. I had planned to take a picture of us kissing in our caps and gowns so we would always remember the day.

“I didn’t know he’d ditched Sophie. I can’t believe he would let this new chick tag him like that.” The girl passes her phone to the person next to her, heads close together as they gossip.

Heart pounding, I lift my graduation gown enough to pull my phone out and look up Carter’s socials. He’s been tagged in four different pictures. The first one, the one that makes me feel like I’m going to throw up in the middle of the administration calling students to the stage for their diplomas, is the most damning.

It’s a shot of him immediately following a practice, if his red face and sweaty hair are any indication. There’s a girl, dressed in a jersey with his number on it and leggings, leaning up and kissing the corner of his mouth.

The mouth that would say such sweet things to me and kiss me until I couldn’t breathe.

My heartbeat pounds in my ears as I scroll through the other pictures.

This can’t be happening.

The rest of the photos are of a party, and Carter is in the background, surrounded by not only the puck bunny from the first picture but multiple others.

They were all uploaded today. My vision blurs and tears hit my phone screen. How many times had he told me, “It’s you and me, Soph.” or said that we would always be together?

Why would he do this to us?

“Look, Carter was loyal.” Abbie’s words snap me out of the memory. “All throughout high school, girls tried to get his attention, and he only had eyes for you. I don’t think that just… changed. A picture is worth a thousand words, but they aren’t always the words we believe they are. Just… think about it, okay?”

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