Page 59 of Eternal Hoptimist

Parker’s hand stilled in his rhythmic circles on my back. We were silent for several minutes. Both lost to our thoughts, I supposed.

“Are you sure Rosie wants to save it?” Parker’s voice was gentle, but my hackles rose.

“Of course that’s what she wants. It’s herhome.It’s where she lived with her husband for decades. It’s where he was born.” When I realized he’d simply asked without pushing an opinion, I calmed. He wasn’t my parents. “You would’ve loved Great-Uncle George. This land meant everything to him. When I got upset with my grandfather or needed a break from my parents, I would come here. George would pass me one of his work hats and take me around to teach me about the plants and trees. He’d show me critters by the creek and tell me stories of the people who lived on the land before colonization. He loved this place so much.” Tears burned the corner of my eyes.

I needed to change the subject. “You enjoy being gagged.”

The rumble from Parker’s chuckle shook us both. “That obvious, huh?”

I exhaled, relieved he let me change the subject. “The way you were basically salivating when you handed it to me was a giveaway.”

He pinched my hip. “Don’t tease.”

“You love it when I tease.” I looked at him and expected to find heat in his eyes, but what I saw in his face took my breath away. Affection. Pure fondness. Contentment. It was how I’d always wanted someone to look at me.

“I do.”

I wanted to sit up, straddle his waist, pin his hands to the bed, kiss him breathless, and make him listen to me, tell him how much I adored him, tell him it had never been like this with anyone else. That, to me, there was nothing fake about what we were doing. That it was more real than anything before. But I wasn’t ready to say those words.

I’d always been impulsive about love. What if the lesson I needed to learn was through my resolution? My dating break wasn’t as much about some arbitrary number of days where I remained “single” but forcing myself to slow and let something real develop or move on.

“How’s the food truck project you’re working on?”

“It was going fine until you got in my head.”

“What did I do?”

He wrapped his arms around my waist and took my weight. “I’ve been thinking of things you said and about Caleb’s story. I’m wondering if there’s a way to help my clients while also keeping the vibrant nature of the space as it is with the food trucks.”

Parker told me his idea about possibly turning part of the ground floor into a food court-type space to keep people visiting the area and to be an added attraction for the condos being built.

I straddled his lap and pinned his hands as I’d wanted to not long ago and kissed all over his face. “You’re brilliant. That’s such a great idea.”

He laughed and squirmed but leaned into my kisses while wrapping his arms around my waist. He watched me, his eyes earnest. “You really think so?”

His vulnerability took my breath away. Why did he care what I thought? “I do. Honestly, I’ve learned so much about the difficulties of running a food truck in Portland from Caleb. How devastating it can be when you think you found a permanent location and it gets taken away. I know your priority is your client, but people are getting increasingly vocal against this type of development. It seems wise on a lot of fronts.”

“I hope my client goes for it, but I’m not getting my hopes up. My boss didn’t seem too excited about it.”

“Pfft. Who could say no to you? I can connect you with Caleb if you’d like to bounce ideas off of him. I know he would keep it confidential.”

“I’d love that. Thanks. What if I came to town and had dinner with you, Austin, and Caleb next week? I could rent a hotel room for the night.”

My heart rate picked up. “Perfect. You tell me what nights work for you next week, and I’ll set it up.”

I might not be ready to say the words, but I could show Parker what filled my heart and soul. And I did by putting the gag to good use again.

CHAPTER 22

PARKER

Hector:Guess what the gossip at the Keurig was today?

Parker:Do I even want to know?

Hector:It’s about you

Parker:Oh god