Page 60 of After Tonight

“Fuck no,” he said, scowling. “You’ll never be like everyone else in Sapphire Falls anyway. But, no. I want you to be happy. If I thought you really were, that the rebellious thing and living far away and working for big companies really did that for you, then it would be great. But you’ve been looking for something—for a long time. Like maybe since you were in high school. And I think you’ve been looking for a way to contribute and be a part of something that matters and be close to your family, without losing out on being your own person. I want that for you.”

Yep, that was what she’d wanted to hear out loud. Because she was quickly realizing that having Derek Wright know her and get her, and want her anyway, was a really, really huge turn-on.

“You want me to be more like you.”

He frowned, and blinked, and frowned again. “What?”

“You have all of that. You contribute and are a part of something and are close to your family—and everyone else here. But you’re your own person.”

He must have realized how close she’d gotten, because his gaze dropped to her lips. “Am I?” he asked.

She hadn’t expected that. She paused. “Are you what?”

“My own person. Or am I just like everyone else who never got out of this town? Am I fooling myself into thinking that opening a pizza business will somehow save me from looking back someday and wondering what else I could have done? I mean, I’m thinking about seriously dating someone now just because my friends are settling down. How is that being my own person?”

Riley had never, in all the years she’d known him, seen Derek Wright vulnerable. And it was doing something to her insides that she couldn’t explain. She knew somehow that he’d never said this stuff to Kyle or Scott. But he was saying it to her.

And one of the things he liked—no, loved; he’d said loved—about her was that she was honest with him.

“Are you happy?” she asked him.

He met her gaze directly. “Yeah. Overall.”

“And can you imagine doing anything else? Teaching? Being a lawyer or a dentist or flying airplanes or farming?” she asked.

He shook his head. “No.”

“Because you don’t think you’d be good at any of that? Or smart enough? Or dedicated enough?”

“Because I don’t want to do anything else.”

She smiled, feeling strangely triumphant and happy. For him. “So you’re happy doing exactly what you want to be doing.”

He took a breath. “Yeah.”

“Derek, the only reason that feels weird sometimes when you look around, is because very few people get to that point this early in life. Some never do. You did. And frankly—” She thought only for a millisecond about not admitting this to him. “I’m jealous of that.” Then she said something she’d never imagined saying to Derek. “And you’re right. About me. I’ve been restless for a long time because I’ve been telling myself to be one way, while my heart’s been telling me that’s not right.”

He ran a hand down her arm. “Don’t tell me you think these tattoos are wrong. Because these are hotter than hell.”

She smiled, looking down at the intricate swirls that covered her arm. “No. Not those things. The tattoos and the hair and the piercings and the computer stuff…that’s all me.” It might have started as a rebel-against-her-mother thing, but she’d quickly realized that expressing herself that way was very satisfying. “But,” she met his eyes again, “I don’t want to work for corporations or banks. I think computer and tech work for law enforcement is right up my alley.”

He grinned. “You just started that.”

But she knew he wasn’t disagreeing with her. She nodded. “Yeah, well, when something feels right, I think it’s very possible to know right away.”

Their gazes held, and they seemed to be agreeing silently. And not just about her computer work.

“You’re going to make amazing pizza, you know that?”

“Yeah, well, it’s just pizza.”

“Nothing you do is just anything, Derek,” she said, sincerely. “You put your heart into the things you do for this town. This will be the same.”

He nodded. “Which means if it fails, it will hurt more.”

Riley was thrilled with how he was opening up to her. “So don’t fail.”

He gave her a grin. “It’s that easy?”

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