Page 34 of Smooth Sailing

“Nic?”

“We can’t make people love us the way we want. We either accept their love as it comes, or we reject it. With that said, Diana, he loves you. He’s always loved you. It might not be how you need him to do it, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there.”

Dang, crap, shit.

I was going to cry.

I couldn’t cry, not only because I hated crying, but Hugger was going to be back, and I didn’t want him to see me all puffy-eyed.

I also didn’t want to spend time thinking about why I didn’t want Hugger to see me like that.

Fortunately (but also unfortunately with the confusing things she said), Nicole spoke again so I didn’t have to consider that.

“You’re old enough now, I think what he has to say, you’re mature enough to hear.”

That made my head come up from the glass because, what the hell did that mean?

“What are you talking about?” I asked.

“I’m not sure I know,” she said, sounding uncomfortably like she was hedging. “What I do know is that being frozen out by you for a decade undoubtedly gutted him, and that’s not a guilt trip, sweetheart. He’s been perfectly capable of extending an olive branch over these years, he didn’t do it, and it was his place to do. So that isn’t on you. But now that seal has been broken. Reconnect with your dad. If it’s still damaging to you, step away. But I know you. If you don’t try, you’ll regret it. And if you let it last too long, and you two can find some footing you both are good with, you’ll regret you lost even more years you could have had with your dad.”

“You having it together can get really trying,” I groused and heard her soft laugh.

“He’s a flawed man, but we all have flaws, including me,” she declared. “One of them, falling in love with a man who was not right for me. It brought me into your life, so I don’t regret what I did, because it earned me you.”

“You need to stop being awesome so I can see while I make tacos for a woman with a target on her back and a biker. No one wants tears in their tacos. I suspect, not even bikers.”

I heard the humor in her tone when she replied, “Okay, I’ll let you go. Larry sends his love.”

Nicole met Larry about a year after Dad divorced her. They got married two years later. I was a junior bridesmaid.

He was good-looking, worshiped the ground Nicole walked on, and had two kids from a previous marriage. He didn’t want more. Nicole didn’t want any of her own, but she was all in to spread her awe-inspiring stepmom goodness around, so she did that with Larry’s kids, just like she did with me. They adored her. Larry (and the kids) adored me. I adored all of them.

It was a win-win-win-win.

So…again, Nicole was the only steady I had in my life.

And it meant everything to me.

I sent my love back, disconnected and headed out of my room to the closed door to Suzette’s.

I knocked. “Suze? It’s me.”

“Yeah?” she called.

I opened the door to see her curled up on her bed with her (actually my) iPad.

She was a pretty little thing, but so tiny.

Damn.

Lots of blonde hair, big blue eyes, and what had once been perfect peaches and cream skin.

I couldn’t imagine anyone laying a finger on her in anger, doing so to harm her in any way.

Just standing there in the door to her room, I wanted to gather her in my arms and will all her hurts away.

I couldn’t do that.

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