Page 42 of Unexpecting

″You didn’t do anything. People are gay from birth, not because of anything their slightly obsessed ex-girlfriend did in bed.”

″I’m not obsessed,” I protested weakly. Even though Cooper didn’t respond, I could tell he’d raised his eyebrow at me. “Maybe a little obsessed, but not that much.”

″Well, we can agree to disagree on that issue. But David being gay wasn’t caused by anything you did. Or didn’t do. And you know that. You’re not stupid, even though you probably feel like it right now.”

″I guess,” I muttered into his shoulder.

″I’m sure knowing he’s gay explains a lot.”

″Kind of,” I admitted. “He never seemed as into me as I—”

″Please. No details.”

″You obviously have an issue talking about sex.”

″I don’t need any more images clogging up my brain. Sex aside, Case, even though I hate seeing you like this, I’m glad things didn’t work out. I’ve never met the guy, but wow, you can really get a hate on for someone from hearing how perfect he is. This way you can finally give up any hope about you and him, because there’s absolutely no hope now. It’s been over ten years, so maybe you can get rid of his ghost and move on.”

″He wants to have a baby with me.”

″Of course he does. I’ve moved from hate to loathing, just so you know. What did you tell him?”

″I don’t know.”

″You don’t know what you told him, or you told him you don’t know?”

″I told him I don’t know.”

″Because he’s gay?” Coop asked honestly. “Because that would solve your problem about getting your donor guy, even though I’m under the impression this guy is more than your usual asshole. Or is it that he’s gay and you didn’t know it? So you dated a gay guy—it’s not the first time. Look at Liza Minnelli and Star Jones—they married gay guys!”

″The fact that you know that scares me.”

″I’ve been living with you for years. You leave enough magazines around to wallpaper the place. I’ve picked up a few worthless tidbits hereand there. But do I have to remind you where you work? You’d think you’d have developed better gay-dar.”

″I know, I know. I mean, when it’s obvious, sure, but they don’t wear signs, you know.” Coop laughed at me, which almost made me cry again. “I didn’t know,” I told him, serious again. “Honestly.” If I had a baby with David and we were connected by this bond for the rest of our lives, and I had to watch him get involved with men, knowing that I wanted him involved with me but would never have the chance… “I’m an idiot.”

″No, you just haven’t gotten over your first love. You haven’t let yourself get over him,” Cooper corrected. “It might be time, don’t you think? You’re thirty-five and still pining over this guy. Since you were twenty? Maybe a bit of an idiot.”

″Do you think I should have a baby with him?”

″No,” Coop shook his head empathetically. “It would make it too complicated, him being gay or not. You’d open yourself wide open and you’d never get over him; you’d only get hurt. I don’t want that for you. If you want to have a baby that bad, I’d rather you use me than him. Let David find his own incubator.”

″He doesn’t think of me as an incubator.” I gave a little laugh that ended in a hiccup.

″No, and that’s the problem.”

It felt nice sitting here with Cooper’s arms around me. He’s such a good friend. This thought led me back to Morgan’s comment the other day. “Morgan thinks you were in love with me,” I blurted out.

″What?” His voice had the right amount of disbelief, but the way his arms abruptly stiffened around me made me pull back with disbelief.

″You were in love me with me?”

“No,” Coop scoffed without looking into my eyes.

“You were! How can I not have known this? Are you still in love with me?” I couldn’t believe Morgan was actually right about this.

Cooper finally looked at me. “No, Casey, I am not in love with you. I love you dearly as a friend, but that’s it. Maybe I once thought…”

″Really?” My voice softened with amazement. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

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