Page 102 of Ruck Me

Chapter32

AOIFE

You’d figureafter numerous unanswered text messages and calls that went straight to voicemail, I would have given up. But Declan and Sophie were right. I had to tell Eoin he was going to be a father. Which was why, like a deranged stalker, I was camped outside Eoin's house at 10 p.m. on a Friday night, waiting for him return from the team’s semi-final match.

At 4 a.m. I jolted awake, disoriented and with a kink in my neck, to the sound of Eoin and Tadhg stumbling down the sidewalk, Tadhg doing his best to keep Eoin upright. This was not how I’d envisioned this conversation happening, so I slid down in my seat as they ambledby.

Not that they were paying attention to me. Even though it was almost dawn, they were speaking loudly and without any filters. Even so, I cracked my window so I could hear their conversation better.

And immediately wished I hadn’t.

“I should have fucked her,” Eoin proclaimed loudly, his arms flung wide. He toppled into a hedge lining the walk, and bouncing off it as if the bush hadn’t just saved him from landing on his drunk ass, he continued, unfazed. “She was riding my jock man; her pussy was right there for the taking.”

Tadhg shook his head. “You weren’t going to fuck her in the middle of the goddamned club, and we both knowit.”

“But the point is, I couldhave.”

Tadhg paused, considering the probability of that actually happening. “Yeah, probably. But that’s not you,” he said, pulling him further down the sidewalk. “You’re not thatguy.”

Eoin shrugged out of Tadhg’s grip and came to a wobbly stand-still, his feet planted firmly on the concrete while the top half of his body swayed to and fro. “I am thatguy!”

Tadhg turned to face Eoin, but I could still hear his voice crystal clear in the silence of the pre-dawn light. “That’s just the booze talking.”

“It isn’t,” Eoin disagreed, crossing his arms over his chest, his biceps bulging. “I need to fuck her out of my system.”

Tadhg shook his head. “Do what you gotta do man, but maybe try it sober, yeah? You got enough on your mind without having to worry about whiskey dicktoo.”

Eoin palmed his cock and rocked his hips, a motion I missed like crazy. But that beautiful, magnificent cock was what had gotten us into this situation. If only I’d kept my lips to myself that night at his friend’s apartment. Because once I’d kissed Eoin, all bets had been off. My eyes scanning his body appreciatively, I admitted to myself that had never been an option. The moment I’d walked up those stairs, there had been no goingback.

Speaking of goingback—

“Let’s go back!” Eoin proclaimed loudly, jogging on uneven feet in the opposite direction. “I bet she’s still there,” he called back over his shoulder.

Tadhg let out a frustrated growl and shoved his hands through his hair. “She’s not there,” he answered, jogging to Eoin’s side and turning him toward home. “The second you left the dance floor, she was grinding up on that Aussie.”

Eoin stopped dead in his tracks. Even from here, I could see the rage that took over his features. “You can’t fucking trust women,” he snarled, punching a finger into Tadhg’s chest with each word. “Lying fucking cunts, all of them.” His hands dropped to his side, and his shoulders slumped in drunken defeat.

Tadhg sighed, his big chest rising and falling, and then he wrapped his arm around Eoin’s shoulder. “C’mon, man. Let’s get you intobed.”

A few seconds later they disappeared into the house. When I was sure they wouldn’t see me, I sat up and started the engine. Swiping the heel of my palm over my cheeks, I pushed away unexpected tears. I’d made a huge mistake, and I was willing to pay the price for lying to Eoin, but how could he be on the pull less than a month after breaking up with me? He’d told me he loved me, that he’d wanted to marry me someday, but based on what I’d just heard, I had a hard time believing those words. If our roles were reversed, I’d be at home wallowing in my misery, not out trying to get fucked.

Yeah, but lying’s not why he broke up with you, I reminded myself miserably. If that were the case, I might have been able to repair our relationship. No, he hated me because he thought I’d gotten rid of our baby, something I still had a hard time understanding. Regardless, that was why I needed to talk tohim.

But that would have towait.

In the meantime, I needed to get home. I eased my car down the street, taking one last look at the window to his room, glowing from within. Tadhg and Eoin stumbled across my field of vision, and then the light flicked off. Once the room fell dark, Eoin’s drunken ramblings came back to haunt me. Hearing him talk about fucking someone else broke my heart into a thousand shattered pieces. Knowing that I’d shaken his faith in love stomped those pieces into the ground. Tadhg was right—Eoin wasn’t that guy. He’d never been disrespectful toward women, never talked about them the way a lot of other mendid.

He does now, my subconscious chimedin.

Apparently, he does, I agreed sadly, driving towardhome.

I’d tried texting, calling, and now waiting outside his house. One way or another, I needed to tell Eoin he was going to be a father. After what I’d just witnessed, I dreaded it even more than I had before. I didn’t think my confession could fix what I'd broken, but maybe it would restore his faith in … well, in something.

You keep telling yourself that, the judgmental voice in my head snickered as I turned on the radio and cranked the volume all the way up, hoping the sound of 80s power ballads would drown itout.

The thing was, I was pretty sure it was right.

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