Page 61 of Irreversible

The tickling nerves return as I close my eyes and exhale through my nose. “She’s married to a wonderful man. The best. She’s his world, and he’s hers. A romance straight out of a fairy tale.”

“But…” Isaac prompts.

“But she’s always wanted just a little bit more.”

“Chloe likes it kinky.”

I scoff at him, my skin ablaze. “You keep interrupting.”

“Are you blushing over there?”

“No.”

“You are.”

“Stop trying to read me through a wall.” Smacking my hand to the divider, I reach for the blanket and yank it up my body, asif I can hide the stain on my skin from someone who can’t even see me. “I’m going back to sleep.”

“You can’t. I’m invested now.”

My cheeks flush hotter as I snuggle into the blanket, tugging it up to my chin. I have no idea what I’m even doing. Confessing my fantasies to a total stranger? An incorrigible one, at that.

I’ve lost my mind.

Then again…I’ve lost everything else.

What’s one more thing?

I close my eyes again, picturing Isaac leaning against the wall, directly behind me. Waiting for more. “Well…Chloe had an unconventional upbringing. Her father died when she was a baby, leaving a newborn and a single mother behind. Her mom had dreams, ambitions. Most of all, she loved to dance. It was her favorite way to express herself.”

I pause, waiting for him to interject. He doesn’t.

“Her mother worked as a waitress for a while, until the low pay and meager tips weren’t cutting it anymore. When Chloe turned seven, her mom transitioned into a new line of work.” I pick at the frayed edges of the blanket, focusing on the tattered little strings. “She became an exotic dancer.”

He’s silent. Listening.

“Chloe never resented her mother for it. On the contrary, she was sort of…inspired. She looked up to her mom, appreciating her drive and strong will. Her mother was gone a lot of the time—late nights, absent during the weekends. But the time they shared together was precious, filled with love and attention. You’d think her mother would have kept the truth from her daughter—a dirty secret, hidden in the shadows—but that wasn’t the case. Her mom was proud and unashamed, and as Chloe got older, she started asking questions. Her mother always answered them truthfully. Chloe felt emboldened by itall. And while she never wanted that for herself, she respected her mother’s choices.”

Pausing, I wait for a crass comment, but not even the tinkle of a jangling chain breaks through my words.

“Anyway, I guess sex just became this acceptable thing growing up. It was never taboo. And as Chloe became an adult, the idea of it was exciting. Exhilarating.”

I chew on my inner cheek, wondering how much more I should give him. These details are private. Not even Jasper understood the depth of my feelings, and I never wanted to shake things up between us. I was afraid, terrified he’d see me in all the wrong ways and distance himself from me.

Isaac shifts in place behind me, his chain scuffing the tile. “So…what you’re saying is, Chloe grew up and found herself employed at a respectable sex club as a hot dominatrix, with whips and handcuffs and?—”

And there he is. “No. God, no.”

“Right. She was all about the strap-ons.”

“You’re impossible.” I smack the wall again, despite the smile hiking up my lips. “Chloe fell in love. She was studying for an exam at a wine bar. Every Friday night, she’d study by herself with a glass of red wine. Enter Jason. Jason was handsome, charming, smart, and savvy. He knew all the right things to say and how to sweep her off her feet. There was an instant connection that led to a marriage proposal one year later at that same wine bar. It was a dream come true. Something out of a movie.” When Isaac falls silent after my words trail off, I tip my face closer to the wall. “Are you still with me?”

“I’m definitely following.” He clears his throat. “By day, Chloe wants a nice gentleman who treats her like a queen and spoils her with pretty flowers and sunlit serenades. But by night, she craves a man who demands she gets on her knees, so he canfist her by the hair and shove his massive cock down her throat while calling her his good girl.”

My eyes grow twice their size, my skin fizzing with neon heat.

I open my mouth to reply, but I can’t seem to conjure up any words.

Isaac taps the wall. “Something I said?”