Page 74 of All Your Firsts Without Me

Love forever and a day,

David

P.S. Keep singing and I’ll always be able to find you.

After crying until the water grows cold, I pull myself out of the tub and dump the contents of the envelope in my hand.

Two leather bracelets drop into my palm, each with a tiny silver band with the coordinates to the place where it all began. I laugh because for once David was wrong. It actually began at the Humane Society, but the gift warms my heart, nonetheless.

I’m sad because that was my last letter, but strangely the heaviness isn’t there. It doesn’t hurt to breathe. David is at peace. This was his final goodbye.

I pick up my phone, and as I do, I realize how Westin has become my person. The person I want to share my news with. Good, bad, everything, I want to share everything with him.

Me: I read the last letter.

Westin: Why didn’t you wait until I was there? Are you okay? I’ll come home.

Me: I’m fine. It was a good letter.

Westin: You’re sure?

Me: I’m positive. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

Westin: I love you.

Me: Love you too.

“Hey, girl. You want to go for a drive?” I place one of the bracelets on the dresser and strap the other around my wrist.

When we get in my car, I type the coordinates on the bracelet into my GPS. I’m expecting it to take us to the White Glass but that’s not what happens. It’s showing the location as being several hours away. I glance at Lucky. “I’ll be right back.” I go inside and grab the other bracelet.

Lucky’s tongue is wagging when I get back to the car. She is ready to get this show on the road.

“Hold on, girl.” I type the coordinates off the second bracelet. Same thing. The location is almost two hundred miles away. Rubbing Lucky’s head, I ask her, “You want to take a road trip?”

She licks my face. I giggle, pulling my seatbelt across my lap. “Let’s go see what kind of crazy goose chase David is leading us on.”

Lucky and I drive with the windows down and the music up. It’s such a beautiful day. We are getting close to our destination. I’m so confused because the letter said it would take us back to where it all began, and I’ve never been here before. We are on the outside edge of a small town, with white picket fences and kids playing basketball in their driveways.

But when I make the final turn, everything begins to feel familiar. It leads me down a dead-end gravel road with only two houses on it. They are spaced a good distance away from each other, a grove of trees separating them. My heart stops.

I sit across the road from the first house, staring at it. An old man hobbles out of the home that used to be mine.

I roll down my window. He offers me a kind smile that helps me to relax.

“Can I help you?” he asks, stopping a few feet away from my vehicle.

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to trespass,I used to live here. I was just remising. I used to play out in the trees over there.” I point in the direction of the grove of trees.

His smile widens. “No worries, hun. You go ahead and explore all you want. Do you want to go inside?” he offers.

My eyes go back to my old home. The one we lived in before the compound. “No, thank you for the offer though. Would it be okay if my dog and I walk out amongst the trees for a little while?”

“You go right on ahead. I’ll be inside if you need anything.” He tips his ballcap and heads back inside.

“Now that’s small-town hospitality,” I tell Lucky as I hook her leash to her collar. I walk down the driveway, then turn to the right, heading past an old chicken shed to the tree line.

I push past the trees until I’m starring at the house my neighbors lived in. My heart slows as memories come flooding in. I lower myself to the ground just like I used to when I was little. Lucky doesn’t join me, she’s too busy sniffing nature.

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