Page 25 of No Longer Safe

This time he laughed and I knew I was on thin ice. “Money? Yes, I love to make money, Son, but the money that comes from your trashy whores is nothing compared to what I’m doing.”

Ah, yes, here we go. He was pulling the strings of elected officials. He didn’t have time to worry about petty things like strip clubs, drugs, or whores. How funny he would forget what it took to get him to where he is. How amusing that he would forget where he came from. His ancestors set him up. They were the firstmafiain New York City. They started out as thugs and the money just kept coming until my father. My father who now controls the city. He would love to say he controls the state, but I’m not sure that’s entirely true. He has his hand in many pockets, but I don’t think it’s that many. He also likes to forget that he started out owning strip clubs, though they were a lot classier than the fine establishments my brothers and I own, that doesn’t matter. He started out like us too. He has the scars on his back, the bullet wounds that almost claimed his life. As much as I wanted to say all of this, I knew better.

“Find a more respectable hobby or I’ll find ways to ruin your life. You must put on a better image for this family. I’m tired of the tabloids talking about you and your brothers and the wild nights you have.”

“Yes, Father.”

“Thank you.”

The line went dead and I shook my head. He would never get it. He only cared about image now.

I placed my phone on the seat beside me and thought of the one girl I shouldn’t. Audrey Wilde. In a way I absolutely hated her. I hated her in the way that I couldn’t stop thinking of her and when Father asked me to start dating and looking for a wife, I hated that I thought of her first. Which was insanity. She wasn’t marriage material, not in this family. She was already dating someone, even if he did suck in bed. I ran a hand down my face and shook my head. I didn’t know why she mattered. I didn’t know why I thought about her. I didn’t know why when I closed my eyes at night there she was and Iloathedit, with every fiber of my being.

Chapter Eighteen

Audrey

Things were looking up,not sex, but everything else. Brian and I were going to lunch together and catching the occasional movie. He promised no more late nights at the office and he followed through. He wasn’t late anymore when we decided to meet for dinner. It seemed like things were back to normal.

It felt good,right. But also entirely too confusing. Why couldn’t we have a good sex life? What did I need to do? Carina said I needed to communicate but I was terrified to do that. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings even though he’d never once thought about how I would feel over his scathing comments.

I’d spent my day searching Marketplace on social media. Why? I honestly couldn’t tell you, that was how bored I was. There was a Pole Class about forty-five minutes away from our home. I was sure Brian would get on that train. I planned to tell him about it as he slid into the booth across from me for dinner. I would try that or the pottery class that was an hour away. Not like it mattered how far I drove, I didn’t have anything better to do with my time.

Brian swallowed audibly as he tapped his foot a few times. He swiped his wrist across his forehead and for the first time sincewe got here, I noticed there were some beads of sweat collecting there.

Confused, I leaned forward. “Are you okay?”

“Huh?” He blinked a few times as if he were coming out of a daze. “Oh, yeah. Everything is great.”

“So there’s something I want to talk to you about,” I felt as nervous as Brian looked. I ran my hands down the tops of my pants.

“Oh?” He hummed as he tapped his menu a few times and looked at anything but me. “I have something I want to talk about with you too.”

“Would you like to go first?” My brows pulled together on my forehead. He looked like he was ready to jump up from the booth and take off down the road.

He dragged his hand down his mouth and then his jaw. “Yeah.” He cleared his throat and pushed his hands under the table where he fidgeted a few more times. “We’ve been seeing each other a while.” He swiped his hand down his face again and I realized he was much sweatier than I originally thought. He was more nervous than I was, by far. “Five long years and we’ve been really happy. So happy.”

Comfortable, but yes, he was onto something there.

He cleared his throat again and dug his finger into the collar of his shirt to loosen it up a bit around his neck. “So, I was thinking, maybe, it was a good idea to, I don’t know, get married.”

The blood drained from my face. Was this really happening here? Now? At Millie’s Diner?

“I know this is probably the last place you’d like to get proposed to, but I thought we were on a time crunch. I don’t want you to think I don’t want to marry you, and my mom is right, you aren’t getting any younger, and if we do want to havekids, we should probably hop on that train soon.” Then under his breath, “I can’t stand that this Alexei is texting you.”

I swore my frown grew deeper with every word that left his mouth. How had that man wiggled his way into every aspect of my life? Also, I wasn’t entirely sure these were reasons to get married. Why on earth was his mom even mentioned?

I nodded for him to continue or for him to at least get on one knee, because that’s what he was doing, right? Proposing? He blew out a breath and got up from the squeaky booth. He rolled his head and cracked his neck before he got down on one knee and with shaking hands pulled a little velvet box from his back pocket. My heart pounded in my chest as I clasped my hands together in front of me.

“You’re the only one I see my future with,” He popped the box open. Surrounded by black velvet was a sparkling ring nestled in cushion. It wasn’t very big and I wasn’t sure there was a diamond in the center. “What do you say? Do you wanna get married?”

I wasn’t sure I was hearing his words correctly. There was no proclamation of love. I nodded, completely unsure of myself because this was what I wanted, wasn’t it? I’d been practically begging him to propose, maybe not out loud but at least in my head. I was ready for this, wasn’t I?

He smiled as he got off of the floor and what seemed to be the entire town, roared with clapping and whistles. I reached forward with my left hand and he slid an entirely too big ring on my fourth finger. It was fine, it could be sized. Everything was fine. I peered down at the ring and smiled softly.

Where were the butterflies? The elation?

It would come, I tried to convince myself. But the more I thought about it, the more I knew this was it. I would never feel those things for Brian. I still allowed him to pull me from the booth and kiss me softly on my lips.

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