Page 49 of It's Complicated

“What does that even mean?” She tilts her head uncomprehendingly. “What is it you’re not telling me?”

I stare at the ceiling for a long instant. The words are on the tip of my tongue… I’ve been holding them back for so long… but now they want out. Yeah, I could give Lori whatever rubbish excuse, but what would be the point?

“Jace,” she pleads. “If you don’t tell me Ican’tknow. Let me in. Please.”

I turn my head and lock eyes with her. “The way you’ve felt about Aiden for all these years…”

“I already told you to leave him out—”

I raise a hand to silence her. “That’s how I felt about you—how I still feel about you. I’m in love with you, Lori, I have been since forever. So unless you can honestly tell me you feel the same about me, that I’m the only man you want, we can’t take this any further.”

20

LORI

Jace’s words floor me. The wind’s been knocked out of me. I’m frozen in place, my eyes wide, my mouth hanging open. He loves me? I stare at him, unable to speak, still trying to process. He’s been in love with me for years? My entire world has been tilted upside down.

I open my mouth to say something, anything, but I have to close it again because how do you respond to a declaration like that?

I search the room, half expecting a camera crew to jump out from behind the couch and yell, “You’ve been punk’d!” But Ashton Kutcher is nowhere in sight, so I just have to assume this is real.

I focus back on the man on the other side of the couch, still not sure how to respond.

The flicker of hope in Jace’s eyes fades the longer I keep quiet while the set of his jaw hardens. “That’s what I thought.” Jace grabs his discarded T-shirt from the floor, pulls it back over his head, and stands up. He crosses the room to go stare out the window, back turned to me.

I pull my tank top back on as well and follow him. Tentatively, I hug him from behind, pressing the side of my face between his shoulder blades. Jace goes rigid at first but then slumps, exhaling a deep breath.

“How long?” I ask him.

“Since the beginning. I knew the night you got pranked in the shower.”

I inwardly cringe. That night was one of the lowest moments in my academic life. Someone stole my clothes from the shared bathroom and I had to walk back to my room wearing only a towel, which wouldn’t have been so bad per se, except that it was a Saturday night and everyone was out in the halls, mingling, and then I tripped and basically flashed half the dorm.

“So, it was love at first flash?”

Jace’s shoulders shake with amusement. “No, although I won’t pretend that wasn’t a tremendous bonus.” Somehow, this conversation is easier to have face to shoulders instead of face to face. My cheeks are already burning, and I wouldn’t be able to sustain Jace’s stare as he reveals all this new information. “What I fell in love with was your boldness as you strolled half naked across the crowded halls as if nothing strange was happening. The way you held your head high even after you accidentally dropped the towel in front of the entire golf team.”

“Then that was my best performance; you’ve no idea how much I was hyperventilating inside.”

“But you have a way of always being able to laugh off any situation. To stay positive no matter what. And, yes, seeing you naked moved you out of the friend zone good and forever. Since that night, I have wanted you.”

I shift position slightly, burying my forehead between his shoulder blades, whispering, “So why don’t you want me now?”

“I don’t want just your body, Lori. I want your head and I want your heart. I want the full deal or nothing at all.”

“I always thought you dated those plastic sorority girls because you weren’t interested in someone like me.”

Jace relaxes a little more and lets out a soundless laugh. “No, I’ve always dated girls who I knew weren’t after anything serious and that I wouldn’t hurt. Because basically, I wasn’t available.”

“Ah, I bet Nancy Powell would beg to differ.”

Jace shrugs. “I’m not perfect, sometimes I misjudged.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Don’t worry, I get it if you don’t feel the same way.” The quiet hurt in his voice destroys me.

“Jace,” I whisper, and press a kiss against his warm, solid back.

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