Page 147 of Cruel Lies

As I expected, his eyes scanned the space behind me, face falling visibly when he realized I was alone.

"Where’s Harper?"

And there it was. The crux of the problem.

Harper.

Since we’d run into her again, our whole lives had turned upside down, and changed us all in ways none of us had wanted or needed. Now, she had both my brothers so tied up in her that their first question on waking was about her.

Neither seemed concerned with my presence. It washerthey longed for on their deathbeds.

The woman who was indirectly and directly responsible for their near deaths, and all the misfortune to befall them in life.

No. That wasn’t fair.

We had no one to blame but ourselves for the choices we made.

"She’s gone, Angel," I said plainly, flipping a chair around so I could rest my arms across the back of it as a headrest. The world was so heavy these days. I just wanted to stop carrying it for a moment.

But the only person who’d been willing to take that weight away from me left. And it was all my fault.

"I chased her away."

His face was a mask of indifference, but I could see the pain in those expressive violet eyes. I could feel the disappointment in the air around us. The letdown showed in the way his lips pursed, trying too hard not to frown.

"Oh," was all he said, his eyes glued to me, waiting for me to willingly give an explanation.

But I had none.

Well, that was a lie.

I had one.

The truth.

"Why didn’t you tell me sooner?"

Angel was brilliant, but he liked to play dumb when he was fishing for intel. Now was one such time, and fortunately for him, I had no choice but to play along as he looked out the window and smiled softly. "Tell you what?"

"That you and Nash didn’t need me anymore."That somewhere along the line, I’d become the useless one.

"We do need you, Rowan. We just don’t need a protector anymore. We haven’t in a long time." He laid a hand on my shoulder, wincing as he leaned forward. "You wouldn’t let us shoulder any of the responsibility. And we were content to let you, so wrapped up in our own issues. But you never got to live like we did. You were always under his thumb, so we didn’t have to be." His gaze softened as I realized he was right.

I’d always been ‘Responsible Ro,’ the one everyone could count on. The good son. The devoted, filial son.

And yet I’d never quite measured up to my father’s expectations, partly because he expected if he pitted me against the brothers I protected with my body and my soul, one day, I’d grow to resent them.

Along the way, I suppose I had, from time to time. But our bond was too strong to be broken. And I did this out of a sense of love, not of duty.

That kind of bond wasn’t so easily broken.

"You can’t let him win now. Even in life, you found a way to beat him, Ro. You saved her twice. Now, it’s time to start living for yourself, not us." He leaned back as the door cracked open and Nash shuffled in, sheepishly grinning as he leaned heavily on his IV pole.

"Came to crash the party, fellas. Who has the booze?"

Angel’s laughter quickly turned to a grimace as he laid back on his pillows and closed his eyes momentarily. "Man, laughing hurts when you get shot through a fucking lung."

"You think that sucks. Imagine getting stabbed in the sternum.How embarrassing. By my own knife, too, man. Like, I’m mortified." Nash pantomimed his stabbing, and I realized something as I sat there watching these two idiot brothers of mine, both decked out in hospital gowns, hooked up to tubes and monitors, barely one foot out of the grave.

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