Page 24 of Worth the Wait

I was tempted to text herMerry Christmas, but I stopped myself, the way I always seemed to. My self-control was damn near award-winning.

I decided to take a shower before heading over to my dad’s farm for all our Christmas festivities. I walked into the shower and turned both showerheads on high heat. I’d built this main shower for two people—for me and Addison. She always used to complain about how cold it was, waiting her turn whenever we showered together, and I had known the solution—double showerheads.

Memories of us together flashed in my mind, and I was instantly hard as a rock. Her body had been made for mine. Her ass used to press firmly against my thighs, and it’d only take a little adjusting to allow me inside from behind.

Closing my eyes, I swore I could almost feel her here with me. Her skin had always been so smooth; it used to turn me on every time one of my callous fingers ran across it.

She’d claimed to like my rough edges.

I lived for her soft ones.

“Fuck, I miss you, Addi,” I said into the empty room, my hand reaching for my dick and stroking.

I saw her with me. Felt her touching me. Smelled her everywhere. The memories became a living thing that overtook my senses. I ran my hand over my cock, stroking and pulling, while my other hand braced against the cold tiles.

“Addi,” I breathed out as the room filled with steam.

I couldn’t stop now. I was on the edge, so close to tipping over it. When I pictured her bent over in the shower, her perfect ass in the air for me as I fucked her from behind, I came undone.

I exploded with her name on my lips and a mess on my hand. As I came down from my high, reality crashed into me. Slowly, I stopped stroking myself and let the water rinse me clean.

Even jerking off to thoughts of her was downright torture. Because every time I opened my eyes, she still wasn’t here. And that fact alone was slowly tearing me apart from the inside out.

I shut off the water, stepped out, grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my waist before catching sight of my reflection in the fogged-up mirror. Stopping short, I wiped a hand across it and leaned in to stare at my face. You would have thought after what I’d just done that I’d look at least a little bit relaxed, but I didn’t. My features were tensed, my eyes pulled together like I was in pain.

Shaking my head, I tried to rid my thoughts of Addison as I got dressed, but it was no use. She was a part of me that I couldn’t extract. So much of my life had been intertwined with hers; it was hard to unravel it all.

Sucking in a deep breath, I shifted my focus toward Christmas at my dad’s and the best niece on the planet. Thank God for Clarabel. She was the absolute best thing when it came to the holidays. The pure joy she exuded was something that we had each needed at one point or another. That little girl had no idea that she saved us O’Grady men from ourselves.

And we all spoiled her rotten, each one of us competing for her affection. I still knew she loved me best though. I’d built her a damn room in this house. I’d be her favorite uncle forever.

I grabbed the ridiculous amount of presents I’d bought for her and went to work on tossing them into my old beat-up truck, Jasper right on my heels the entire time.

“Ready, boy?” I asked as soon as I put in the last of them.

He wagged his tail and hopped into the passenger seat, where Addi used to sit.

“Let’s go,” I said, and he looked at me as I revved the engine to life and drove off.

Christmas music played through my radio speakers, and I didn’t have the heart to turn it off. Not today, of all days. I found myself singing along as I turned onto the long dirt road that led to the family farm.

When I parked my truck next to Matthew’s monstrosity, I realized I was the last one to arrive. Everyone else was already here. I hated being late, even though I technically wasn’t. Stepping out of my truck, I held the door open for Jasper, who jumped out and made a beeline for the back door, barking loud enough to announce our arrival.

I watched as the door swung open, and Clara’s little face appeared as she lunged at Jasper, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him the way she always did. Jasper let her hang on him, his tail wagging the entire time. The two of them disappeared inside the house, and my youngest brother appeared in their place. He gave me a look like he couldn’t quite gauge my mood.

“Get over here and help me,” I shouted, and he hustled over without question.

“Trying to buy someone’s love?” he asked like the smart-ass he was.

“I bet you bought her more,” I said as I loaded his arms up with the gifts.

He laughed a little before shifting on his feet. “So, uh, did you hear from Addison?” he asked as he tried to look around the stack of presents, but I’d buried him up to his eyes.

I swallowed hard. “Why are you asking? Did you text her or something?”

“I might have,” he responded before adding, “Let me go put these in the house before you yell at me.”

I grumbled under my breath in response, but followed behind him, my own arms filled with gifts. The two of us dropped the hoard of presents at the base of our dad’s massive Christmas tree. He always got the biggest one he could cut down. This one looked as tall as it was wide. I kind of loved it. Addison would have adored it.

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