Page 59 of So Thrilled For You

Just as I was trying to figure out my next move, the door swung open again, Lauren in the threshold, cradling her head like it was falling off.

‘Just so you’re all aware, I’m literally dead,’ she announced, plopping onto a chair and putting her forehead on the table. ‘I’ve blocked the toilet with my sick and, I’m sorry but I feel too rough to clean it up right now. Please, take mercy. I just need a pop tart and I’ll . . .’ She looked up and her mouth fell at Matt’s presence. ‘You don’t live here,’ she told him.

Matt blushed into his frothy coffee. He looked beyond adorable. ‘This is my friend, Matt, from Nightline,’ I explained. The air hung awkwardly as we all filled in the blanks as to why he was here, in last night’s clothes, so early in the morning.

‘Oh . . . Matt’s your name is it, then?’ Lauren said, giving him a hello hug and then pointing behind his shoulders and mouthing‘Jawline Guy!’ to me. ‘Sorry if I stink. Last night was a journey for all of us, mostly my stomach lining.’

‘I told you not to get an Indian AND a fish-and-chips takeaway,’ Nicki laughed.

‘You were also correct that I shouldn’t have tried mixing them all together in the same giant bowl to see if it created the best takeaway of all time.’ She nodded at Matt. ‘It quite closely resembled what our toilet currently looks like. Sorry,’ she said, just as I objected. ‘I think I’m still drunk. Nicki, will you come into my room and stroke my hair until I go back to sleep?’

Nicki heaved herself up with a good-natured sigh and went to escort Lauren out. She looked undeniably cute in her pyjamas. ‘It was nice meeting you,’ she told Matt. ‘If you get a Nightline call at 2am from someone with a Pokémon bestiality issue, you’re going to know it’s me.’

He laughed and he looked so, so, hot when he did. ‘Indeed I will. Good luck with the, er . . . hair stroking?’

Lauren winked as they left, all like,look I’ve given you shagging opportunity time, and I mouthedthanksback. It felt awkward, when we were left alone in the kitchen, the freezer underneath me haunting me with how un-awkward it had been in the early hours of this morning.

‘I’m so jealous of girls,’ Matt announced, stretching up and reaching over to eat my toast crusts. ‘When I’m hungover, my housemates ruthlessly take the piss out of me, or force me to compete in eating challenges. I’d love it if we just lay about in our pyjamas and stroked each other’s hair.’

‘I’m not sure if all girls do the hair stroking,’ I said, grateful we were bantering again. ‘Lauren got blind drunk the first time we all went out together. We had to take her back to her halls, where she spectacularly vommed everywhere, and then started crying. She wouldn’t go to sleep, and kept screaming, ‘STROKE MY HAIR.’ All three of us ended up doing it, like she was a Roman emperor. It’s become . . . a thing.’

‘They’re great,’ Matt said. ‘Your housemates seem great.’

‘Thanks. I agree.’

I agree?Why was I talking like a fake grown-up? How did I get our energy back? How did I lure him back to my room where I’m sure we could restore things after Nicki’s interruption?

‘I . . . umm . . . you’ve left your jumper in my room,’ I said, leaning against the wall as alluringly as I could.

‘Of course, yeah. Thanks, I’d have forgotten it otherwise. I’ll just head up and get it now.’

‘I can help?’

He was already at the door though, rushing up the stairs. ‘No worries, it’ll only take a sec.’ I crossed my arms further over myself. It was way too cold for these pyjamas and my nipples were sticking out. The sound of Matt running downstairs again, and he appeared in the doorway, wearing his jumper, looking very much like a boy ready to leave the house.

‘Cheers,’ he said. ‘Right . . .’

‘Umm . . . you can stay, if you’d like?’

‘Oh, thank you. Sorry, but, I really need er . . . the . . . toilet, and it sounds like yours is blocked.’

I opened my mouth. I was about to say, ‘I’ll unblock it for you,’ then stopped myself. If he wanted to stay, he would stay. He’d hold it in, or suggest we go out for brunch or something. I couldn’t understand how he’d become such a stranger so quickly. Last night was a popped bubble, leaving me blinking in surprise.

‘Last night was fun,’ he added, finding his trainers by the door and putting them on.

‘Fun, yeah.’

Not amazing, or special, or magical, or even great.Fun.

‘I’m sure I’ll see you soon. Doing a night shift or whatever? It’s going to be crazy when they let us loose on the phones.’

‘Hmm, yeah.’

‘God, I’m so hungover. Are you?’

‘Yep.’

‘Well, I better go. Dying for a piss actually.’

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