Page 58 of So Thrilled For You

The hangover was starting to kick in. Dry mouth, thudding skull, queasy belly.

‘Gus was lethal,’ he agreed. ‘Shall I go make us toast and bring it up?’

‘Only if you don’t mind me proposing.’

He laughed again, stroked my side, making goosebumps dance on my naked skin.

‘Have a doze. I’ll collect the carbs. What bread is yours? Or do you all share a loaf?’

‘Mine’s the Hovis granary.’

‘Of course it is, gym bunny. Right, coming up.’

I turned the pillow onto its fresh side, smiling at the soft thud of his feet going down our carpeted steps. Screw the toast. Maybe we’d have sex again when he came back up? Maybe he’d go down on me again? I never thought I’d enjoy that but I’d never had Matt do it to me. I smiled myself into light slumber, horny, imagining all the sex yet to come as the weekend continued. Hopefully continuing into the next week, or month even? I could see Matt being my boyfriend. Not just an average one, but a meaningful one.

He’d be ten minutes. Fifteen tops.

But, when I woke at the sounds of laughter from downstairs, with no Matt and no toast by my side, it felt much later. I checked the time and saw it was almost eleven. A whole hour has passed. More laughter and the deep sound of Matt’s voice through our squeaky floorboards. A siren rumbled through my skin and I scrambled to get myself ready. I stepped into my sexiest pyjamas and quickly dashed to the toilet to pee and brush my teeth. I told myself stories to override the alert. He was just being friendly to my housemates. It would be great if they got to know each other – helped make it more‘boyfriendy’.He was probably just letting mesleep. So caring of him. Again, so not one-night-standy. If he was only in this for sex, surely he’d have come up and tried it on by now?

I ruffled my hair, smiled at my reflection, and banished the insecurity from my face. I heard laughter again, and padded downstairs, barefoot, in my tiny pyjamas, arranging a smile on my face as I pushed through the kitchen door.

Matt was sat with Nicki at our tiny, dilapidated table, two cold bits of uneaten toast on a plate before him, presumably for me. They both had mugs of her special frothy coffee in their hands, and they both froze when I said, ‘hi.’

Matt looked momentarily stunned to see me, and then alarmed, my inner siren loudened, my ears buzzing. ‘Steff. Oh my God! Sorry, I’ve been ages. Here. Here’s your toast.’

He pushed the plate towards me, going red, while Nicki giggled.

‘I . . . thought I heard voices.’ I meant it to come out breezy but it sounded suspicious,needy.I winced internally and crossed my arms over myself. ‘You’ve met each other, great.’

I watched their eyes lock.Theirs– not mine and his. Nicki giggled again.

‘It’s my fault, sorry,’ she told me. ‘We started talking about Pokémon. I got excited there was a fellow geek here and we went off on one.’

Matt pointed over with gun hands, like he had with the beer tap at me. ‘She didn’t just talk about Pokémon. She actuallyfanciessome of them.’

Nicki shrugged, non-embarrassed. ‘What can I say? Growlithe is weirdly hot.’

They laughed together and Nicki sipped more from her coffee mug. She was showing no sign of leaving the kitchen, even though her breakfast bowl was empty. She looked the total opposite of me in the wintery morning light. I was shivering in my skimpy silky short pjs, last night’s makeup smudged around my eyes, my bob wild and bed-headed. While she wore almost comedically-clichedpyjamas–blue and white stripes with buttons down the front. Her face was fresh and clean, her hair plaited neatly into two cute braids.

I bit into my toast, and wondered how to invite Matt back up to my room without it being obvious I was up for round three.

‘How was your night?’ Nicki asked me. She literally leant back in her chair and put her slippered feet on the table – the ultimate sign of settling in. ‘The barn dance thingy? Did you raise enough money?’

Matt winked at me and I practically swooned in relief at having his attention again. ‘It was fun,’ he said. ‘Totally mad. Really nice to not be just out with students for the night. We got so drunk though, didn’t we? I can’t remember much.’

I bit my lip. Was that true? Did he not remember my heels digging into his bare arse, only hours ago, right here in this kitchen? Did he not remember the taste of me in his mouth? The groan he let out that I had to cover with my hand?

‘Steffi?’ Nicki asked, while I slowly and deliberately perched on top of the storage freezer to jog his memory. ‘Was it good?’

I winked back. ‘It was great. Loads of money raised for Nightline. The most important thing, really.’

Matt raised his mug to cheers me and I relaxed a millimetre.

‘Anyway, what have you guys been chatting about all this time?’ I asked. ‘Other than the shagability of Pokémon?’

‘Oh, everything and nothing. You know?’ Nicki said.

No,I thought.I don’t know.

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